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Fears of school
The first day of high school scared me to death. I looked at every corner but I couldn't find my friends. Then I realized I had to start over. I felt miserable and just couldn't get out of my comfort zone. I was this little fish in an ocean, didn't feel special and felt like I was UN talented. I had to use to my talents to stand out. I was so mad that I was constantly troubled by the wants and, needs of everyone. didn't’t have a moment to figure out what I wanted and not what others did. It felt like time was moving so slow I could hear my heart beating. I needed to figure out what my passion was and what I wanted to do with it to stand out. overwhelmed by the thought of getting recognized, I was tired of been an outcast and been under someone else`s spotlight. I needed to find my place in this world but I needed to do it fast but surprisingly slowly. I needed to shut everyone out of my world but instead it was the quite opposite cause I needed them in my world. I was tired of trying to impress everyone I cared about and finally started taking control of mine. I had to be the captain of my own ship but the scaring part was I had no map and didn't't know where to go or which ways to turn. didn't't want to ask for anyone`s help but at that time, it's felt really foggy, not easy to see, blind, seeking for an explanation on who I'm supposed to be, I know I’m young and I have a long road ahead of me, but I need to start paving my way, figuring out things on my own and finding myself. I sometimes feel lost and I wish I was somewhere no one could find me, wishing I could have someone there to guide and protect me and feeling un sure about myself and everyone around me. Not sure if I should get close to them or just try to accommodate them while I’m still me. I’m still growing and sorting out part of my life. Don`t know who to trust or talk to. Feels like a ticking time bomb ready to explode and it`s attached to me. Now I'm standing on my own, no one to hold me down from achieving my dream. I know that I'm not going to stop looking for who I'm supposed to be. No one can make me back down of making me find myself. This journey is tough, but I am going to get there eventually.
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