I told her I felt sick. I was at school and my stomach was not feeling well at all so I decided to tell my mom, who didn’t have a good relationship with me to begin with. Her hair is long and dark with numerous blonde highlights that are trying to cover the grey. She has buff beige skin that was once hugging her high Native American cheekbones and light green eyes that were just not very forgiving. The phrase that woman used the most was “Wow.. really…”. It always made me want to severely break something when I heard her say it in that high-pitched slow voice.

She texted me back after I told her that my stomach felt sick and that I was nauseated and she says, “ Are you pregnant?” My mind goes into this shock and I feel hatred building up inside of me. I was thinking, “Maybe if she took the time to actually get to know me and care about what goes on in my life then she wouldn’t have asked a question that contained so much severe stupidity.” It wasn’t just that question that made me go off. I replied with, “What the hell, no?” Then she did what she does best; didn’t keep her mouth shut when she should have. “I think you need to go to the doctor”, she says. By this time I am not only furious but I’m also extremely hurt because I am confused as to why she is doing this to me.

I told her to say one more thing about me being “pregnant” and she would be sorry. I get a message back saying “ :)”. A smiley face. A grown woman that is also a mother sent me a smiley face in order to be smart with me. I accused her of things she had done wrong in the past like being unfaithful to my dad and about how she is just like her mom with the way her personality is so fake and worthless. I talked about how I thought she was so lazy and brought up how I knew she didn’t care about me and I didn’t want anything to do with her anymore. By this time, things got serious. She called me a “b****” and that was the end of it. I called my dad and said, “You better make sure she does not say a thing to me when i get home or I’m gonna put hands on her”.

Of course I’m the one who gets blamed and scolded. This made me hate her even more. Every time the snooty woman walked past me she did not look at me and it made me want to laugh because she was so immature. We didn’t talk for a month and some odd weeks. Things got hard. With not being able to ask for her favors like wash my clothes or take me places, I started to realize that I did need her for some things. I noticed that since she was really in a way “Cut out” of my daily life. I wanted her back in it. But, of course but I didn’t how to do that. My goal was to get her to apologize to me. She never did.

Finally one day I asked to go to my boyfriend’s house and my dad said that I couldn’t go until I apologized to my mom. He told me that she was crying the other day because we weren’t talking. I was furious because I’m not the one who should say sorry. It was all her fault. I pushed my stubborn thoughts aside for a moment and said, “I’m sorry.” She looked at me and said, “For what?” In my head I wanted to say, The truth is that I’m not sorry. Instead I said, “You know what for..” In response she said, “Why did you say all of those mean things? Did you mean that?” Her baby-like voice started to crack and choke, trying not to cry. Again, I wanted to tell her that yes, I did mean it all because I actually did; but I said, “No.” She made me give her a hug and she started sobbing. I thought it was utterly pathetic at the time.

After that day, she started to realize that if she treats me like that then I can withstand not talking to her and do it on my own. Yes it was hard, but I could have gone way longer. She was wrong and never admitted it but she started to give me respect. When she gave me respect, I gave her respect. Our relationship got stronger month by month and we learned how to actually get along. I learned how to love my mom.