Football | TeenInk

Football

November 27, 2007
By Lonsdale Stuffle, Brooklyn, NY

F- force from one defender to a blocker

O- offense scores, that's game

O-officially you have won the season

T- to not enjoy your win would be a great sin

B- back and forth,up and down the field you go

A- all of a sudden you fall

L- learning later in life you lose your legs

L- learning that to smoke and abuse drugs as an athlete is not good because now you went from a player of football to a player of nothing.


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on Jul. 20 2009 at 3:09 am
To Lonsdale S. on 'Football'

I like the fact that you used an acrostic poem to describe football. Football is one sport where people outside the sport don’t always perceive a depth of learning and understanding in the players as a result of playing the sport because it is a game that involves brute force. Using the acrostic poem form (F-force, L-learning) is like writing a definition and the definition you wrote involves both ‘Force’ and ‘Learning later in life’ (the alliteration here also works well).If you want to make any changes to this work I would simply consider adding a photograph or some kind of a preface. It’s not clear to me as a reader whether in the last part ‘learning that to smoke’ you are speaking from personal experience with substance abuse or trying to warn the audience. You could try using ‘I’ , ‘we’, or ‘he’ instead of ‘you’. You are talking about yourself or your team. I am talking about ‘Football’ , I didn’t all of a sudden fall, You did, so consider ‘all of a sudden I fall’ or ‘we have won the season’ in your work and then I know you’re talking about you or your team.