I missed you | Teen Ink

I missed you

March 16, 2017
By KarMoon BRONZE, Culpeper, Virginia
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KarMoon BRONZE, Culpeper, Virginia
3 articles 0 photos 2 comments

Author's note:

In a way, I myself am Leila. I struggled to make friends and always found myself talking to random strangers online, sharing my life stories and getting great responses back. These are some experiences I have had, or feared having, brought into this world in words. I hope to show that it's okay to talk to people online, and sometimes that the only choice, you have, and that's perfectly fine. I too, want to have the same somewhat happy ending that Leila did some day.

Leila’s eyes filled up with tears as walked down the aisle of the bus; kids all talking to their friends in whispers and pointing at her and her soaking wet shirt. Walking to her front door, it all played over in her head like a movie

“Hey weirdo” A boy her age said as he yanked her earphone out and started to poke her on the shoulder. They were at the very back of the bus so no one noticed anything, not even the bus driver. He continued to bother her and even pulled her hair a bit until she noticed him, but it wasn't in any way what he expected. She grabbed his shirt collar and threw him back in the seat. This got a few people's attention. Caught off guard, the boy looked got up and looked around at the other kids observing the action. One of them coincidentally had a water bottle and he grabbed it, swiftly twisting the top off in one quick movement, and poured it all over Leila’s shirt. The kids around her laughed and gathered around, ignoring the bus driver’s commands to sit down. When the bus pulled to a stop and the old bus driver stomped his way down the aisle with smoke coming out of his ears practically, all of the kids moved out of the way and sat down in their seats like they were supposed to, even the boy who poured the water on her shirt. After a long interrogation, and a lot of whining coming from the boy, the bus driver gave everyone a warning and returned to his seat.

She’d had enough of all the bullying and name calling. Nothing was going to be done about it, so she just had to deal with it, and being a person who suffers from extreme social anxiety, she has no friends to help her cope. Her parents? Too busy to even acknowledge her, only coming home to cook dinner and then gone like the wind as quickly as they came.

Leila stepped through the front door sighed. No one was home, but then again when are they ever. The house reeked of smoke and alcohol and the trek up the stairs seemed to take forever as she plodded her way up. In the safety of her room, she tossed her bookbag somewhere in the corner of her room and softly cried as she made her bed. Going through her desk drawer, she found what she needed and sat it atop her bed, opening the lid and pressing on.

She shuffled through her closet to find a hoodie and peeled her soggy shirt off her skin in disgust, before grabbing a towel, drying herself, and throwing the hoodie over her head. Leila changed her pants to and closed her door, locking it just to be safe, and turned the lights off. There was really no point in turning the lights off, but Leila just seemed to prefer to set of fairy lights that she had strung all around her room messily. She loved the way they looked like stars in the night sky as she drifted off to sleep, and imagined herself flying up to the sky and having a better life. Sitting in front of her laptop, she scrolled through multiple websites and sat with a blank stare.

Beeep~ Beeeep~

Leila jumped as she looked around her room to see what the sound was. Her phone sat on her night stand, not a single noise coming from it. Was someone in her home? Were they coming to attack her? Kidnap her? Maybe it was a ghost. Oh no, Leila was terrified of ghosts. All these thoughts flowed through her head at once, but were interrupted by the beeping noise again. Confuse, Leila calmed herself so she could see where it was coming from, the possibility of it being an intruder being waay to crazy. Hugging a blanket close to her body, she finally looked down at her laptop to notice a little pop up on the bottom right of her screen. Incoming call, it said. With a shaky hand she grabbed her mouse and moved it to the end call button. She had no friends or family who cared about her, therefor no one important was calling her, right?

About 10 minutes had passed and Leila spent her time watching youtube videos because she didn't have any homework, and that was the next best thing.

Beeep~ Beeeep~

Even more confused than before, she decided to answer it this time. In the ten minutes she was watching videos and doing absolutely nothing they had called 6 more times, making this time the eighth. Her mouse hovered over the accept call button before her finger moved on its own and clicked the button on the mouse.
“Hello?” A male voice said, “Leila, is that you?”
“H-hello?” Leila said hesitantly, “who are you. And why are you calling me?”
“Oh my god Leila, its me, Ro”
Leila froze in her spot. Her eyes that had stopped leaking its tears a while ago, once again filled back up and blurred her vision. Ro was one of her few friends she had found comfort in online. She was always on her phone, having no one really in real life to talk to, and she met Ro one some messaging app. At first they were complete strangers, but they quickly became best friends, completely devoting all of their time to each other. Leila about hugged her laptop screen in excitement, but instead kept it all to herself. Maybe she could take this as an opportunity to vent about her problems; like the old days.
“Ro… i’ve missed you  so much. You don’t understand.” Leila said. Her voice cracked as she said it, and Ro let out a chuckle. She missed that, his laugh.
“It’s okay Lei” She missed that nickname too, “You don't have to cry i’m here now.”
And after that, Leila completely lost it, not even being able to say a single word. Her head was flooded with so many emotions she hasn’t felt for a while, and with memories she refused to remember. They talked and talked all night long, catching up on the stuff they had missed out on for the two years they haven’t spoken to each other. Leila figured out how to control her tears and got the best advice that anyone could give. She told him about the incident that happened on the bus earlier and giggled as Ro told her about how he would beat up the boy if he did. That was the first time she actually felt at peace for a long time and was able to truly laugh. A real laugh, not one that she felt she had to do just to fit in and be normal with the kids at school. Feeling better than ever, Leila said,
“I thought you forgot about me”
And Ro simply responded,
“Never”



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