Have you ever had anyone buy a house and throw elaborate parties all in the, admirable, attempt to win your eye à la Jay Gatsby. No? Funnily enough neither have I. The most romantic gesture that’s even been thrown my way was a lukewarm cup of coffee bought for me, elaborate I know! As a book geek I have spent more hours being seduced by the words of Scott F. Fitzgerald and Oscar Wilde than by real, breathing human males. It’s not that I’m a complete recluse and incompetent of male companionship it’s just that I feel no one can live up to the greats.

Literature tells us of love gone wrong, for example take 'Romeo and Juliet'. The cat never got the cream and it all went up in flames however the tale of the star-crossed loves still strikes me as one of the most realistic (perhaps a tad cynical and over the top but hey ho, that's poetic license for you) interpretations of romance, love and relationships. It shows there are faults with man and things aren’t always that great. After all, the next example shows us that the “course of love never did run smooth”. 'Midsummer Night’s dream' consists of a medley of confused, hormone struck fairies frolicking around, infliction curses upon each other and breaking bro-code to an legendary level. And quite frankly one must learn from how this ends that it’s not true and the saying “all is fair in love and war” shouldn’t be one to live by for the sake of your social life, it doesn’t excuse abandoning mates for your ‘new man’.

In every great novel there must be a token couple whom everyone can cling onto- a bad guy, good guy and a mildly perplexed woman. When it comes to ‘The Great Gatsby’ there are so many love stories it would work as a feature episode of Waterloo Road. Jay Gatsby is portrayed as the ‘good guy’ (and in the film thanks to being played by Leonardo Dicaprio he’s also the hot guy…) whilst Tom Buchanan comes across as a manipulative player stringing along a mistress whilst his wife, Daisy, lives in a state that is not so ignorant and far from bliss. It is not all fun and games as one finds themselves reading of a sticky situation with a few deaths and a mega jump back to square one

I also feel there’s a lot of romantic injustice when it comes to literature, for example why doesn’t Éponine get Marius- that girl would, and did, take a bullet for him whilst Cosette was a tad blasé on the subject going so far as to bugger off thus leaving her love. I may be boycotting Valentine’s but I shan’t be embarking on some romanticised interpretation of Plath’s response to love-gone-wrong (I promise I’ll stay away from ovens). I was instead planning on catching up on the latest episodes of Parks and Recreation with a big cup of Chamomile tea.