I know I told you
I needed a break,
Then within two days
He was kissing my face.
So maybe, honestly,
I just needed a break
From you,
Because being loved
Wasn’t something
I was used to,
And a year was too much
For me to understand,
I couldn’t get
How you put up with my s***
For twelve whole months,
And so I didn’t make you
Put up with another year
Of my same mistakes,
Me falling for other boys,
Looking for something new,
Crying to you
About how my mom
Tried to die,
But never telling you
That I needed you.
You thought I left you
Because I hated you,
But honestly,
All I ever wanted
Was a man like you,
And when my fairy tale
Came true,
I ran from you.
So please forgive me
For the stupidity
Of leaving,
For how I broke your heart
And slept with another man
Within two weeks of being done,
For how I held his hand
In front of you,
For how I started
Smoking again.
Forgive me,
These three months
Have been too much for me,
Made me see
That a year
Wasn’t enough,
And how overwhelmed I felt
Meant that this was going well.
Forgive me,
Forget that I hurt you,
But not that I love you.
And say you love me too.