My Only Hope | Teen Ink

My Only Hope

December 8, 2009
By The_Girl_Next_Door PLATINUM, Elkins, Arkansas
The_Girl_Next_Door PLATINUM, Elkins, Arkansas
32 articles 1 photo 43 comments

Favorite Quote:
~*The mind has but a thousand eyes, and the heart is left with one...Yet the light of a whole life dies the moment love is done.*~


Every day… Every single day it was the same old thing. My schedule was basically waking up, getting dressed, going to school, holding myself together through all the rumors, going home, eating dinner, and going to sleep.

It was all the same…Day after freaking day! But then…a miracle happened: You walked through that door. Everything changed. My thoughts were happy. I was having fun for once! For me, happiness rarely happened. It was so rare that it was almost completely foreign! The moment you sat next to me, something told me to hang on, (just when I was fixing to give in and let go).

A little voice told me life was worth living when I met you and you smiled at me. The moment was perfect! With you, I felt free. It was almost like I was in a trance when we were together. You were the one that changed everything. It was you that I needed! (I just knew it!)

But that feeling turned into something else…I was happy, there’s no denying, but soon I realized that you were different from other guys…Now I dread every time I look you in the eye for fear that I might faint…or die…or, even worse: I feel that I might wake up…Wake up from this beautiful, beautiful dream…I don’t want to! I’m afraid of reality…

You just get me…You know me better than anyone…Well, sort of…
The one thing you don’t get is how much I need you…How I truly feel about you.
It’s just so frustrating! I just look and feel like such a darn fool! How could I have been so stupid? Even when I’m completely livid with you, I can’t help but smile. My knees go weak, and I can’t even LOOK at you without my face going pink! I stumble on words when you do nothing more than smile at me! Don’t you see?!
I think about you DAY and NIGHT! You’re perfect…There’s just one not-so-tiny problem: You don’t see me as more than a friend. How can I make you see? Maybe if you’d open those big, beautiful eyes of yours, you’d see that I’m absolutely crazy about you! I hate it…
No one, (And I mean NO ONE), makes me feel the way you do…I don’t think it will be long before I tire of chasing after someone who doesn’t care…I want to forget you. (I really do)…I hope I’ve learned my lesson…I shouldn’t fall so easily…
In other words, I blame myself…It’s my fault…
But you’re still the only one that gets me. You understand everything about me…
Unfortunately, you seem to be my only hope…
Wait, let me rephrase that: You ARE my only hope… Just trust me…I know what I’m saying. You’re my only hope, and right now, that kind of sucks…


The author's comments:
This is how I've felt about this guy since 5th grade...that's 6 years...Do the math.

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