Buried Alive | Teen Ink

Buried Alive

December 19, 2010
By ramsqb333 BRONZE, Congers, New York
ramsqb333 BRONZE, Congers, New York
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I can't, means I won't."


Motionless, thoughtless, trapped in this hole,
Confusion vacating into this hole, smothering me with anxiety,
My breath is starting to take a toll.

Why am I the one in this ditch?
Trying to find a path, trying to find a glitch,
Is there any explanation, any reason?
Did I do something? Violence, greed, treason?

The confusion is not letting up,
Filling up this hole like a cup,
Non-stopping, everlasting.

Then there was a pause,
Suddenly a flash of light arose,
a rope had flung down with no cause,
Climbing up blindly to where it goes.

Pulled Myself up to see the light of dawn,
But at the end of the maze,
The clear path was gone.


The author's comments:
I use poetry to vent my feelings. Life is very confusing and complicated, and I try to put it into words. Through this poem, I want my readers to find a message about life through the metaphor of imagery and emotions.

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This article has 16 comments.


Heather said...
on Mar. 3 2011 at 7:36 pm
Very impressed with your ability to describe what so many individuals feel but are unable to put into words.

oncorx said...
on Feb. 21 2011 at 6:03 am
Really lile this poem. You put into words what is very hard to describe. Keep writting :)

meow said...
on Feb. 20 2011 at 7:55 am
Liked this poem...esp the title and the topic. Keep writing!!! I was trying to rate it a 4 and the computer accidently resulted a 1 star. Sorry.

cuba libre said...
on Feb. 13 2011 at 9:35 am
Loved the poem. I think everybody in my country feels the same way. 

Marge said...
on Feb. 12 2011 at 12:32 am
Loved the poem, even more so the imagery. Let's keep it coming you are doing a fine job.

Danielle said...
on Feb. 10 2011 at 5:58 pm
Many readers will be able to relate to this poem about the unanswerables (questions we have about life that don't have a definitive answer) and survival.  I love the idea that in the end, it is up to us to survive with your line "pulled myself up to see the light of dawn."  The last line of the poem is particularly insightful as sometimes we think we know where we want to go, but don't always know how to get there.  Sometimes, we even have an idea of what this life is about, but then we are thrown a curve ball.  One last point, the poem's cyclical nature is beautiful.  The missing clear path might have caused to the N to fall into the ditch in the first place.  It was a pleasure to read your work.

on Feb. 10 2011 at 5:47 pm
I really liked your cup image...very descriptive.  Keep writing!  

Bill R. said...
on Feb. 10 2011 at 5:15 pm
Amazing poem.  I can only hope that my kids turn to something inspirational like this as adults.  Put it together with Van Gogh's paintings and you can just let you're imagination run with it.

Haydee said...
on Feb. 9 2011 at 10:33 am
This is a wonderful poem, filled with so much emotion.  It is the same emotions I am feeling about the passing of a close friend just a few days ago.  When a teenager can put into words something so deep, you can be sure that more is to come.  

on Feb. 8 2011 at 4:22 pm
Good imagery and mood.  Very talented!  Keep at it! 

NTatNH said...
on Feb. 8 2011 at 12:33 pm
Poem accurately reflects the feelings one experiences in their teen years.

st4r24 said...
on Feb. 8 2011 at 10:46 am
I believe this is a well written poem!

NECHIE said...
on Feb. 8 2011 at 9:45 am
You can feel deep emotions as you read this poem.  Looking forward to the next.

pdeola said...
on Feb. 8 2011 at 8:11 am
Nice job with the poem!

currymagic said...
on Feb. 7 2011 at 9:23 pm
Reading through this poem i realized that it describes a part of my life perfectly and its just weird to see it in words and images

gporcelli said...
on Feb. 7 2011 at 8:48 pm
Very descriptive poem. Everyone feels like this at least once in their lifetime. Great imagery.