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Digging Out
My silent breath comes out as a knife
My words will stab, but to defend
I realize the knives from inside
And take away my pain I hold
I am loved but unloved
Befriended, and defriended
Resolved and unresolved
Happy, and not
The past holds my refuge
I’m stuck there unmoving
Where it once was happy
I’ll sing my sorrow to no applaud
So many people yet so alone
How can it be that I see none
I’ve got everyone to a side and my side
So how do I feel none?
Where the future rules I do not know
I have never lived it
So what will become of me?
Will I or not survive?
Murdered pasts and unborn futures are my existence
What’s the best that I can do?
The worst that I can say?
To live and move is what I cannot do
I’ll ask once more for your hand out of same
Give me your hand for help
Though this is my hole to climb
I’ll always pull you down
So while I’m sober
I’ll ask you now
Do not help me
Let me climb alone
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