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15 texts I almost sent you from two desks over:
1. I started smoking cigarettes again because I know how much you hate it and I'm okay with dying a little to get the taste of you out of my mouth
2. we are less than three feet apart but I could stretch my arms out for miles and we wouldn't be any closer
3. I can’t stop staring at your hands. remember when they were mine?
4. you never gave me a proper goodbye.
5. can you hear me crying? can everyone else? if you could feel the way my chest is shaking, silent, heaving, would you kiss me one last time?
6. I don't know the first f***ing thing about partial derivatives but I can't ask any questions because if I open my mouth I'm afraid your name will slip out and I will never get it back
7. it would be so easy to breathe into your neck, so familiar. I bet it would feel like home
8. remember that one time we
9. remember that one time we
10. please don't ever fall in love with anyone else. please keep a space in your soul just for me and don't let the girl you meet in your next calculus class or the girl you sleep with at a party or the girl you marry into that space. that space is ours. that space is mine. I am selfish I am guilty I am so so lonely
11. wash your hands before you touch her like you touched me
12. I want so badly to leave this class right now but I know if I do I will find myself at the back door of your house I'll sneak in like I did so many times and wait on the chair for you to kiss me like you did so many times I’m having a hard time accepting that I'm no longer welcome there
13. I will tell every boyfriend I ever have about you. you were my first everything, after all
14. I will taste your name at graduation and I will feel you like the sun on my face when I listen to the strokes and I will eat chili without the noodles and these are the ways I have to love you now
15. I didn't love you the way I wanted to but to be fair I didn't love me either
1. you will love someone else better
1. so will i
1. remember that one time we
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