Somewhere In Brooklyn | Teen Ink

Somewhere In Brooklyn

June 11, 2014
By iDani-iBeauty SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
iDani-iBeauty SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
5 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
- Failure Is Only The Opportunity To Begin Again, Only This Time More Wisely
- Henry Ford -


There is a child raising a child
Neither of them sleep
Tender nor mild
That kid got more stress than rules
Mama got more bills to pay
Than tests to take in school

Somewhere in Harlem
There is a young man
Wondering why his father won't call him
Daddy got 15 in jail
With a phone in his cell
He has yet to give a dial
Cause he ain't even know he had a child

Somewhere in Queens
On the corner is a woman with fear in her eyes
Guilt in her heart
Money on her mind
Wearing skirts that could barely cover up her thighs
She works a 9-5 just like any other woman can
The difference is that she works with 5-9 different men

New York New York
Big city of dreams
Big city of lights
One would think you can see everything

But behind those lights
Behind those dreams
Are the people that create them
Somewhere in Brooklyn, Harlem, and Queens



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This article has 4 comments.


on Jul. 2 2014 at 10:18 am
iDani-iBeauty SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
5 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
- Failure Is Only The Opportunity To Begin Again, Only This Time More Wisely
- Henry Ford -

Thank You For Your Feedback !

on Jun. 28 2014 at 11:51 am
WinterRose76 SILVER, Ok., Florida
6 articles 6 photos 183 comments

Favorite Quote:
Arise and be all that you dream - Flyleaf

This piece has great potential. I thought your poem's concept and message was very interesting. However, the overall flow of your poem was way off. The rhythm was all over the place, and the inconsistent rhyming was confusing. Because of that, I had a hard time staying focused while reading. It's still a good poem though. All it needs is alittle editing 3/5

on Jun. 15 2014 at 11:43 pm
iDani-iBeauty SILVER, Chicago, Illinois
5 articles 0 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
- Failure Is Only The Opportunity To Begin Again, Only This Time More Wisely
- Henry Ford -

Thanks for the feedback !!!!

on Jun. 15 2014 at 5:36 pm
Luv4Ever SILVER, Jacksonville, Florida
7 articles 0 photos 199 comments

Favorite Quote:
A miracle is just another name for hard work
-Minho in "To The Beautiful You"

A few meter issues but a deep message, good work