Route 66 Bar & Grill opened up again. You wouldn’t
like the new location though; it’s right next to that old
s***faced man you used to work for when you were
seventeen. New York City loves us. Sometimes we play
at Lenny’s. They keep asking where you’ve gone. There
are naked ladies in Time Square with nothing but bronze
body paint on. The guy in the Cookie Monster suit is still
there. I know it’s the same one because sometimes he
gives me the same look. Now he charges a dollar for
pictures. Alana says she hopes Nevada is treating you
well. She says she hopes you step in a pile of dog s***.
She says she’s getting better. She says Lenny’s is dead
without you. We have a new drummer. His name is Emory
and he is transgender. He makes the crowd cry.  Do you
make Nevada cry? Maybe we should come out to see you
when we have enough money. Maybe you will miss us
then. Benjamin is getting so big, you would hardly recognize
him. Sometimes he screams for his daddy’s arms. He won’t
even let me console him. He screams himself hoarse, and it
makes me cry that I can’t be enough. Aiden thinks I died when
Lenny’s died. I think I died years ago with all these unanswered
Letters. This is not a plea. I miss you(r everything) most of all.