i remember when i said i would return i meant it so harshly at the time now i am surprised that i followed through
my return is not what i thought it would be not sure what i was expecting ...to be the same when i came back or slightly stronger...whatever i thought, i was wrong. everything is different i'm harder and much colder i've given in and done things i said i'd never do ...seems to be apart of becoming an adult, submission to things you hated and things younger you said would never be a problem ..i am diamond hard and ice cold but my body has become soft and womanly
my curves are my greatest weapon i have become a woman
it's the hardest thing imaginable
and the hardships of it
having world domination at your fingertips
if only you couldn't feel guilt...you'd be golden
if ...only
my perspective has changed in the wierdest way and i'd give anything to go back and have everything have the ignorant golden glow it used to
realization makes a lot of things dim and dull to a dark grayish color i'm not too fond of
but i suppose
at the same time
becoming an adult you feel the fire in yourself more as you realize who you are
there is something inside that breaks and snaps at some point
the drive to be something amazing before your flame is blown out
cold gone and nonexistent
like you were never here
just my random thoughts i don't expect anything from these scribbles just
putting my thoughts together in one line
before the real writing begins
i'm excited
i hope you are too