Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea by Chelsea Handler | Teen Ink

Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea by Chelsea Handler

May 16, 2011
By DreaH SILVER, Earlham, Iowa
DreaH SILVER, Earlham, Iowa
6 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A sad soul can kill you quicker, far quicker, than a germ." -Unknown


Warning: Not for Readers with Weak Bladders!

When Chelsea Handler laughs uncontrollably, she often loses her grip on her bladder. In her second book, Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea, Miss Handler writes of her raucous tales all over the world. She travels to England, Mexico, and even to her parents’ house in Jersey, laughing so hard she pees her pants in each place. Her anecdotes of her crazy life cause readers to laugh out loud while reading. The strangeness of the situations that Chelsea gets herself into is at times unbelievable. Every story shows her zest for life, and Chelsea has definitely touched readers hearts, and sometimes their bladders, with her hilarious second book.

From the beginning, it is apparent that Chelsea has quite the imagination. The first chapter tells of her third grade self concocting a story to impress a fifth grade boy. Soon, the whole school is discussing how little Chelsea Handler is starring in some big movie with Goldie Hawn. Chelsea loves the sudden attention and the scenario continues to escalate from there. It is a rib-tickling tale of a little girl’s quest for popularity. This narrative is the perfect story to open her novel with, because all the qualities that she will show in the rest of the book are found in this one retelling of a third grade mistake.

Each of Handler’s stories is simply hysterical. From her tongue-in-cheek way of recounting the comical memories she has had, she shows that she is not afraid to make mistakes. It is also apparent that she does not care what people think about her. When in England with a friend, she is dragged to a restaurant where diners eat in the dark. Pitch-black darkness is not the best thing for Chelsea, especially not when she has been drinking. After getting caught with her pants off, she and her friend are thrown out of the restaurant. Chelsea Handler does what she wants, when she wants, and nobody can stop her.

My favorite story from this book is the one called Mini Me. In this uproarious tale, Chelsea meets a dwarf that she thinks looks just like her. They go out on the town for a night that Chelsea will never forget. As I read this story, I laughed so hard that I almost peed my pants right along with Chelsea, I will admit it! Chelsea’s hilarious comments about little people might offend some readers, but I found them quite comical.

Most of Chelsea Handler’s humor can offend people, unless they understand it. In this book, she writes with such a tone that there is not one page that bores readers. If you thought her first book, My Horizontal Life, was a stitch, you will love Are You There, Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea. The stories of Chelsea’s life will inspire readers to go out and make their own memories. It also might show them the negative effects of drinking vodka while fish-sitting a neighbor’s goldfish.

Chelsea’s wide variety of offensive adjectives and names caused me to laugh out loud throughout the entire novel. If you enjoy sarcasm and blunt humor, definitely go pick up a copy of Chelsea Handler’s second book. Her third book, Chelsea Chelsea, Bang Bang, is the next on my list. This time I am going to be more wary of where I am sitting while reading...just in case I cannot end up controlling my bladder this time.


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