Fitting In | Teen Ink

Fitting In MAG

By MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
MonicaMS BRONZE, Providence, Rhode Island
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

I wouldn't ask for a dressing room. My mom always asked for me.
The evening before I had repeatedly risen from my seat and piled on excess noodles suffocated in meat sauce. Then I licked my bowl with the buttered garlic bread, leaving no evidence of the four servings I had inhaled. In the morning I would be forced to lie on my bed and suck in my stomach just to button my jeans. I dreaded school shopping. The sale rack, with its slender size markers, knew my number continued to bloat.

I learned how to eat from my dad: fast and without thinking. In our house, the dinner table involved battle, with the children on defense. One false move and our dinner would be snatched off our plates without warning and gobbled up by our father faster than we could blink. We soon learned to keep a hand up while devouring our chicken strips, and if Mom decided to cook that night we needed to hurry and get seconds before it was gone.

Only one pair of jeans I tried on fit. I lied and told my mother I could button every pair but only needed the jeans that lay guarded in my hands. We walked to the checkout.

I kept my head down as we passed a group of girls. They whispered. I glanced up only long enough to know my place. Their eyes cut at me, hands cupped over their mouths in secrecy.

***

The recess bell rang and I followed two girls in my third grade class out past the monkey bars to the fenced grassy area. We all wore the same clothes that year: khaki pants and polo shirts. Everyone was the same, or that was the idea.

“I like your pants. Where did you get them?” Marcy asked Alicia. I nodded in agreement, thankful they had removed their cupped hands and I could hear the conversation.

“Really? I like yours better,” Alicia replied.

“We should trade. What size are you?” Marcy asked.

“I don't know …” Alicia said, finding the tag in the back of her pants. “Seven.”

“Me too,” Marcy said.

***

I hid in line as I held the jeans, tag folded in so nobody could see the number inscribed on it was 12. I am not a size seven.



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This article has 348 comments.


on Apr. 3 2010 at 1:58 pm
ivyhopegirl BRONZE, Holland, Michigan
3 articles 0 photos 4 comments

Favorite Quote:
If there's a book you really want to read, but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it. - Toni Morrison

Your writing was beautiful. I liked it. 

liy_g BRONZE said...
on Apr. 1 2010 at 1:21 am
liy_g BRONZE, Madera, California
1 article 0 photos 10 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You want to know someone? Heart mind and soul? Ask him to tell you about when he was born. What you get wont be the truth; i will be a story. and nothing is more telling then a story."
-'The Thirteenth Tale'

amazing. i felt like i was sitting down and having a conversation with you. i know what that feels like. isnt it the worst? to always feel on your guard? always feel left out...

on Mar. 29 2010 at 9:04 pm
emo_nerd951 BRONZE, Clover, South Carolina
3 articles 5 photos 39 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Always be kind, for everyone is fighting a hard battle." -unknown

That was really amazing!!!  It bothers me when people talk about others like that though because they may know nothing at all about the people they are talking about.  Great job!!!  Keep writing from the heart!!!!

SirSeba BRONZE said...
on Mar. 27 2010 at 11:07 pm
SirSeba BRONZE, Marysville, California
1 article 9 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Just because you can, doesnt always mean you should" ~ achreon

I personaly hate being skinny. I wear a size zero and I hate it. In my opinion it is better to weigh more and have more than just skin and bones. If I had my way I would be a size 12 or size nine. But sadly, I an't gain weight. curse this high motabalism!

on Mar. 27 2010 at 8:09 pm
dancerforlifex GOLD, Monson, Massachusetts
14 articles 0 photos 37 comments

Favorite Quote:
The meaning of life is to give life a meaning.

this has an awesome message! it was really good, i like the amount of adjectives and your choice of words. nice job! :)

Venus_Queen said...
on Mar. 25 2010 at 9:07 pm
omg im so with you and my friend shelley yeah me and Mz.Bryennie know each other we go to the smae homeschool called Ecot lol but i got pulled out in 6th!

on Mar. 25 2010 at 8:11 pm
alwayssunshine PLATINUM, Charlotte, North Carolina
24 articles 5 photos 147 comments
i loved your adjectives! very creative. Powerful message, too. nicely done!

mandygale77 said...
on Mar. 25 2010 at 5:33 pm
Yeah, I'm size 9 too! This was a really incredible piece! I loved it.

on Mar. 25 2010 at 12:02 pm
Mz.Bryennie BRONZE, Cleveland, Ohio
1 article 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
uqh! you annoy me but ilove you

lol iagree iwas pulled out in 3rd too homeskooling fits with me also

on Mar. 25 2010 at 12:00 pm
Mz.Bryennie BRONZE, Cleveland, Ohio
1 article 0 photos 7 comments

Favorite Quote:
uqh! you annoy me but ilove you

i wear a 11/12 too! and im fine with it aslong as your healthy with a good appitite[and ilearned from my dad as well]

Emmalee SILVER said...
on Mar. 25 2010 at 8:25 am
Emmalee SILVER, Rayville, Louisiana
9 articles 14 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans. - John Lennon

Wonderful. :)

luvcornbread said...
on Mar. 22 2010 at 3:27 pm
luvcornbread, Larenceville, Virginia
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments

Favorite Quote:
stay close to ur loved ones ND STAYCLOSER TO UR ENEMIES

i wear a size 9 but its all goo it dont matter wat size you wear just as long as you wear it right and if you look good in it

irish said...
on Mar. 20 2010 at 12:59 pm
hey about the acne, i used to have it too (hormones or whatever) the thing is that it will all eventually disappear.. just don't be agressive to your skin with many products or with your hands.. wash your face everyday with some natural soap that will not irritate your skin.

paperflowers said...
on Mar. 18 2010 at 2:42 pm
paperflowers, Imaginary, Indiana
0 articles 0 photos 176 comments
I wear size 12 too! I was unable to fit in at school - I found that out way back in 3rd grade and so my parents pulled me out... I fit in with the crazy homeschoolers who are too weird to go to school.

on Mar. 17 2010 at 10:45 pm
deardiary BRONZE, Saskatoon, Other
3 articles 0 photos 65 comments

Favorite Quote:
It is a truth universally acknowedged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. -Pride and Prejudice

I'm sure ur the most beautiful girl yet lady! And remember, confidence can make any girl ovepowe another, no matter what they look like.

piglet95 said...
on Mar. 17 2010 at 5:03 pm
it was nice to hear your story...never be self-consious though! Also..how do u enter a teen ink writing contest? anyone know?

on Mar. 14 2010 at 8:35 pm
Authorgal98 GOLD, Frankort, Illinois
17 articles 0 photos 194 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Let your mind sart a journey through a strange new world..."

Remember, size DOESN'T matter! Whats-her face.... I"m not sure what her name is, but the girl who starred in "Prescious" won multiple awards, and she's not exactl the smallest. Really great despriction, by the way!

on Mar. 11 2010 at 10:11 am
TanazMasaba GOLD, Dhaka, Other
16 articles 10 photos 214 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's Heaven on Earth."













---William W. Purkey

when i was 5 i did not know the meaning of fitting in and eventually had the most terrible time of my life. Nobody knows (except my bffs and u guys) even my parents dont know that i went into depression at the age of 6!! i dont know how i recovered but i did and more over i am proud to say that i have always loved my self and even now people laughs at me and i dont care. I hav the right to comment on them just the way they can comment on me.

on Mar. 11 2010 at 10:05 am
TanazMasaba GOLD, Dhaka, Other
16 articles 10 photos 214 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You've gotta dance like there's nobody watching,
Love like you'll never be hurt,
Sing like there's nobody listening,
And live like it's Heaven on Earth."













---William W. Purkey

I have a friend who has the same problem as this girl in the story has.....which means she is like you. And i love my friend because she is 14 and we are in high school and you know how people can be....yet she keeps her head held high and is never afraid of admitting that yes she has some problems and its fine with her!!! she is a real inspiration to me because i have some serious acne problems but staying with her i learned not to care. Its easy as 1 2 3

Mango19 SILVER said...
on Mar. 6 2010 at 1:29 am
Mango19 SILVER, Secunderabad, Other
5 articles 2 photos 31 comments

Favorite Quote:
"If Winter comes , can Spring be far behind ?"
"There are no shortcuts to any place worth going"

well written ! description of the scenes is awesome.. feels real to a stranger like me !