The Bias Starts With Us | Teen Ink

The Bias Starts With Us

July 2, 2015
By EttieGH GOLD, Mbabane, Other
EttieGH GOLD, Mbabane, Other
15 articles 2 photos 46 comments

First, let's get this straight, I know i'm not the first person to write about Society and i'm definitely not going to be the last one either. It's always going to be here and it's always going to annoy people. Here's what I've discovered during my teenage years so far(It's actually helpful).

First of all, my realisation and conclusion all started with my hair and my skin colour. I'm half African and half Scottish, but my hair and skin colour lean more towards the African side of things. My hair is thick, and if i let it grow out naturally it'll turn into an afro. my skin colour is light brown. my whole lfie, looking around, i'd hate not belonging to a certain group of people. I'm coloured, not white and not black. I heard it all from other people too, especially when they saw me beside my half-brother and sister who are white and my cousin who is black.

When i turned 14 my clothes and bookish personality were added into the equation. I dressed likeme. I wasn't afraid to wear pyjamas out of the house, nor was i embarrassed that my clothes weren't hipster. Then boys came into the equation and Facebook started to be more important to me as well. I found myself changing to conform to society.

That means that eyeliner became an everyday thing for me, i went shopping and only bought things i'd seen 'cool' kids wear and i started to shut up when I would usually just speak my mind.

That's when the sadness hit me. My Facebook pictures weren't gettign enough likes, that boy didn't text me back immediately and of course there was acne. I had 'growing' stretchmarks on my knees and, worst of all, the people who i thought were my friends turned out not to be. Sitting back and evaluating all of that, I realised that i was missing out on joy. I realised that i'd dropped everything that I loved to become a part of something and i'd gotten my wish, except i''d become another spot of grey on a grey wall.

Then i started my cleanse. That is, a cleanse of all things not me. I went on facebook and deleted the contacts i didnt knoe, those people who weren't actually friends of mine. Then, i posted the pictures of me having fun, regardless of whether or not i looked like a 10 in them. I started making faces to the camera and i admitted to people that i still read Rick Riordan books because i love them. I realised who my true friends were(People who accepted me) and I dropped my fake ones. I also accpeted me for being me. I might not have hair that can grow down to my butt, or eyes the colour of the ocean, but i'm me and I realised that outward appearances shoudln't matter all that much. I might not have a 'pure' skin colour, but we are all the same on the inside. I started to dancing to songs I love in grocery stores again and making faces at kids, whether or not people were looking at me. I let the careless, childish part of me back out, because that was what I really wanted.

The hardest thing to drop was my bias. That's when I realised that if we judge, we become a part of society. We become a part of the same society that we accuse of being cold and evil and a big ball of hurt towards anyone who doesn't conform. I tried to change to conform to what I heard others say, what they approved of. I hid my vibrant spot on that grey wall to be liked by those whom I thought matterred.

If you want to change society, start with yourself. Don't judge what that person is wearing, or their weight and don't try to get them to change (If what they're doing isn't hurtful to them or others of course). When i stopped trying to be friends with those 'cool' kids and just became me again, I also realised that there are so many amazing people out there. There are so many awesome personalities out there. Their differences make them unique and refreshing as well.

The bias all starts with us and we can actually change things for the better.

The author's comments:

This is all inspired from my personal life experiences.

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