My Journey to Finding X | Teen Ink

My Journey to Finding X

June 26, 2011
By Shayna121 GOLD, Port Charlotte, Florida
Shayna121 GOLD, Port Charlotte, Florida
12 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
I am the master of my fate and the captain of my soul.

My mother and her boyfriend would always end up fighting over me, or in reality BECAUSE of me, which I'm sure has nothing to do with my child-like antics and devious schemes to rid him of my life. I hated her and I especially despised him. He came into my family shortly after my maternal grandmother passed away from cancer and my father was arrested (two separate incidents). I felt like my mom was trying to replace love lost with love found on And I really resented that whenever I gave a sarcastic response to one of his (I deemed) prying questions he would always retort with something better. However, my sophomoric mind was bound and determined to make my mother break up with him so I'd never have to hear his voice again. Well one day a fight ensued between him and my mom over how he treated me while I was arguing with him. The argument spurned from a news interview with the Governor of Minnesota. I rolled my eyes at the fact that he was the governor of a fly over state; states that you fly over but never actually go to (not to offend anyone from Minnesota). He said, and I am paraphrasing, all teenagers are disrespectful and spoiled and they don't know anything about this country and I know more and I'm from India. My mom was so mad with him for attacking my personal character (which he did, but I left the heavy stuff out) by comparing it to other teenagers that she almost broke up with him, and I was almost happy. The break up however did not occur and I was disappointed yet again with the universe. Not a little while later my mom posted a status on Facebook saying "If you could do or be anything in this world and there was no way you couldn't succeed, what would you do/be?" After reading some of the other answers like a better nurse or a Wall Street broker, I was about to right down what, at the time, I wanted to be (which was a lawyer). However being the sarcastic person I am and seeing an opportunity to throw a dig at her boyfriend I wrote, "I'd be the Governor of Minnesota". Another fight ensued, but they still didn't break up and I still wasn't happy. A few months later I accepted my paternal grandparents' invitation to vacation with them, mostly because I just had to get away from the "love-birds' nest", and I went on a cruise throughout the South Caribbean and stayed in Puerto Rico (my paternal grandmother's birth place) for a while. On this trip, I had come to the realization of three things. One, I really, really, really wanted to be happy. Secondly, my mother is my mother and I will always love her no matter what and how could I say I loved someone if I didn't accept their "soul-mate". Even if I didn't like her boyfriend, I would eventually come to respect him and even admire his more witty qualities. Now the third thing I learned on this trip was that I really didn't want to be a lawyer ( or the governor of Minnesota for that matter, although I was truly thinking about it for a while there) because, although the type of lawyer I wanted to be would bring justice to victims of crimes, I truly wanted to make a difference and impact the lives of people that need it most. In addition to the fact, that I really hated the idea of working in an office environment. I love travelling; I love it so much that I have to incorporate it into what I want to do with the rest of my life. While trying to figure out what college major I wanted, I came across some old college letters and one of the majors listed was comparative human development, the study of people simply living. Now a combined major of this and a minor in human rights equals a job opportunity to help those in other countries that need it the most. Sex trafficking, drug cartels, ancient cultures, human biological phenomenon--the boundless world of things I could delve into and be happy while doing it. I found my x, my happiness.

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This article has 6 comments.

on Jul. 26 2011 at 10:38 pm
ohmakemeover BRONZE, Centerville, Minnesota
3 articles 0 photos 98 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Touch comes before sight, before speech. It is the first language and the last, and it always tells the truth."- Margaret Atwood

I totally understood the message, I've had the same sort of issues in my family with my mother and father's relationships.  I think this read more like a diary entry, though, and it could've been cleaned up a bit to have a larger affect. 


(Btw, stop by Minnesota sometime...we actually have a ton of stuff to do!  Minneapolis is the greatest city in the world.  And I'm guessing you are refering to Tim Pawlenty...yeah, we don't really want him either, lol.)

on Jul. 16 2011 at 1:39 am
IAmWhoIWantToBe PLATINUM, Manila, Other
41 articles 0 photos 650 comments

Favorite Quote:
‎"I’m learning how to drown out the constant noise that is such an inseparable part of my life. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone. I only have to follow my heart and concentrate on what I want to say to the world: I run my world." - Beyoncé

This is really good and I like how Happiness is your X, your treasure... :)

on Jul. 15 2011 at 10:08 pm
Garnet77 PLATINUM, Sinagpore, Other
31 articles 6 photos 577 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything's a triangle." ~ My mother

"Write what you love, write what you care about, because sometimes, it's the easiest way to be heard."

This is really good! Your style and voice is captivating, and I like how you tied the whole thing up to your happiness. Very well done. :)

Shayna121 GOLD said...
on Jul. 15 2011 at 3:24 pm
Shayna121 GOLD, Port Charlotte, Florida
12 articles 0 photos 35 comments

Favorite Quote:
I am the master of my fate and the captain of my soul.

I know!!! It really bothers me that I can't edit the post because I didn't realize the paragraph thing until later!

on Jul. 14 2011 at 9:02 pm
WritingSpasms, Los Angeles, California
0 articles 0 photos 121 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Devils run when a good man goes to war."
- River Song from Doctor Who (Ep. A Good Man Goes to War)

I liked the article! I really don't have any criticisms except for the spacing of the paragraphs. :)

on Jul. 14 2011 at 7:55 pm
CarrieAnn13 GOLD, Goodsoil, Other
12 articles 10 photos 1646 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." --Douglas Adams

"The object of life is not to be on the side of the majority, but to escape finding oneself in the ranks of the insane." --Marcus Aurelius

Great article!  You should have split it up into paragraphs, though.  Paragraphs make it much easier to read.  And the &quot thing is really distracting.  I know it's another formatting issue, but I just thought I'd point that out.