The Rubber Chicken Incident

             The clock ticked by: 51, 52, 53. The more the clocked ticked, the more impatient I was able to leave the classroom. Finally, RRRIIINNNGGG, the bell went off, and lunch was just around the corner. It is the middle of football season, my freshman year of high school in 2017. It was a conference game that Friday, and everyone felt cheery and peachy about the game.

After the first five classes of the day, a few friends and I stroll down to lunch and sit at the cold navy blue table where we would always sit. Everyone had his own spot at the table like assigned seats in the classroom, and it never really changed. That day we enjoyed grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup, one of the better lunches in the cafeteria. The yellow oozing cheese would melt in my mouth, and the tomato soup would wash down my grilled cheese like cookies and milk. I loved their golden grilled cheese sandwiches, so, of course, I asked for and extra one because it was a hard food to pass up. As always, I said, “Thank you and have a nice day.”

This always brightens the lunches ladies’ day. I walked back to the table, and it was nice because our table was, of course right by the mahogany doors leading out of the cafeteria. I sat down at my table with all of my friends, and we all chatted, complained, and laughed about the absurd shenanigans that happened throughout the day. At the time, I honestly experienced a boring day, no homework, no intriguing and hilarious incidents, or anything to bring up in general because many of the classes I’m in are not with any of my friends. I sat there, listening to what others had to say about the day, and Logan Bunke yanked out this strange looking object. It seemed rather small and looked yellow, but I could quite apprehend what the object looked like, until I heard the loud, squeaky noise come out of it after Logan quenched it in his hand. It appeared to be none other than a small, sunflower yellow rubber chicken with a suction like mouth. Logan yelled, “Hey, look what I got!” As soon as he pulled it out, everyone including myself, attempted to see who would actually mess around with the chicken first.

“Well, of course,” Alex Desota said, “I will do it because why not.”

He would do it because he was the major jokester of the table. He grabbed the slick rubber chicken, stretched that rubber from neck to feet, and let’s go. Now he shot the chicken straight up, so the suction part of the chicken actually stuck to the ceiling and stayed up there. Honestly, it looked as if someone took a bunch of pencils, stuck them together, and stabbed them into the ceiling. We all thought that it was going be stuck, but no, it dropped back down after about ten seconds. Everyone was already laughing their tails off because of something so stupid yet hilarious at the same time.

After abut five or ten minutes of Alex pulling it off without getting seen doing it, I thought to myself that it would be about time I did something funny at the table. I grabbed the chicken from Logan, and I pulled it back as far as I could without breaking it apart. Then with all my confidence, I launched that sucker straight into the air. It did the exact same actions Alex’s attempt did and stuck on the ceiling. I thought it was ok because it was going fall, but no, it stayed up there completely stuck like peanut butter stuck on the roof of my mouth. Of course, one of the lunch ladies saw the chicken stuck to the tan ceiling and yelled at me to get it down. I pulled the slippery chicken down, half out of breath from laughter, but a bit of embarrassment, too.

After I pulled the chicken down, I was told to go to the office to get “the talk” by Mr. Kuhlman. My heart sank into an ocean of worry. Hands sweating and legs quivering, I went down to the office scared, hoping that I didn’t get suspended or something to that extent. I nervously crept into Mr. Kuhlman’s office. The mood of that office shook every student to the core. The eeriness of walking in a much smaller space and having only one other person in the room; in fact, that person is none other than the principal. We had a talk for about ten minutes in his office, one on one.

Mr. Kuhlman explained, “Peer pressure is something that happens often in high school, and it can affect how people think and act. I know you are a good kid, so please just try to avoid the ones who give you pressure like that.”

Mr. Kuhlman told me it was more of a warning than it was a punishment. A sigh of relief flew through my whole boy, as if a beaver dam had been taken down and the whole river had been flowing with water again. I left the office and headed back towards the cafeteria. Everyone at my table, of course, was laughing so hard because of how funny the situation had become. Alex asked me how the talk went, and I said, “Mr. Kuhlman gave me a warning and we both left the office smiling.” I sat back down and as my friends and I talked some more before the bells rang for the next class, I looked out of the corner of my eye, and I saw the rubber chicken again. It was being held by Mr. Kuhlman, and the chicken was looking directly at me. I could’ve swore that the chicken winked at me. In the end, that day I was put in a very “sticky” predicament of nervousness and a large amount of laughter.