Audrey’s second pregnancy was a blessing to her family. She and her husband, Abel, had been praying for this moment for months and months. The years they had waited to have another child had not been in their favor either. But yet, they persevered. Trying and trying, trial and error, negative pregnancy tests. It was all worth it when they finally read “positive” on the pregnancy test in a CVS parking lot. 

News spread quickly throughout Audrey and her husband’s family. Their first daughter, Jasmine, jumped and cheered at the idea of a younger sibling, and was eager to tell her friends at elementary. Audrey’s friends squealed and congratulated the couple. Everyone was very happy for them. 

Audrey and Abel’s lives revolved on the incoming baby they only had months to prepare for. They made lists of names, played games predicting the gender, argued over who the baby would look like the most, and even whined about the long process they were about to go through. 

Abel accompanied Audrey to every doctor visit with a big grin that showed his pride and passion for his baby. Audrey looked at herself in every window reflection she walked past in the hospital, imagining how big her belly would get. They would listen closely to every word the doctor would say, taking note of it all; taking in the whole experience.

 Their big hearts were shattered when they were told Audrey had a misciarrage.

“What do you mean? I thought everything was going well”, the words could barely come out of Audrey’s mouth. Abel was frozen still and both of their faces ran pale. Audrey could barely move and the room was spinning. She hated herself. “What’s wrong with me?” she thought, “Why would my body do this? Why would my body do this to my baby? Why did God give me a child just to take it all away? What has my family done to deserve this?” Her lips quivered. Abel’s hand met with Audrey’s, and gave it a squeeze. The moment was surreal. Their whole life, world, universe, seemed to come crashing down to pieces. 

The drive home was silent. They were told not to have sex for a few weeks because of the harm it could cause to Audrey. The doctor told them not to try for pregnancy again until she was mentally and physically healed. She didn’t want to look at herself in the mirror, the failure of her own body dragged her down into the darkest place she’s ever been. 

Now she didn’t even expect another pregnancy from herself, they were not allowed to try again for a while, and it was already a challenge to get pregnant to begin with. Everything was going well, everyone used to be happy. Audrey’s thoughts were flooding her mind. “Wasteful. Useless. Pointless”, she repeated in the mirror, “Disgusting monster! How could you? What’s that body for? ” She put her hands on the sink and bowed her head down. She closed her eyes, causing a stream of tears to trail down her dry, pale face. Her hopes for a larger family were left in ruins.

 A month later they returned to the doctor’s office. Their lives were drained, but they still went back for frequent check ups on Audrey. The doctor walked into the room where Audrey and Abel awaited any updates. He looked at his clipboard then back at the couple.

“Well um...” the doctor muttered, directing his eyes at Audrey’s belly, “Something has came up, I’m not too sure how I should inform you on this”

“What? Is something wrong?” Audrey questioned, “Has my body become even more damaged?”

“No-”

“Then what?” Abel exclaimed, interrupting the doctor, “Should we be concerned?”

The doctor pushed his glasses up, “It depends, really. I’m not sure how to explain. Audrey, it seems to me that you’re pregnant. There’s a baby growing in you.”

Audrey and Abel exchanged looks, like they both knew this man was nuts. “Growing? We lost the baby a month ago, there is no baby” Abel informed.

“ I am aware, but it seems you didn’t wait long to try again, congratulations to you both” The doctor gave them a smile, “ This is a very infrequent scenario, I’ll give you time to talk if you need”

Of course they talked. Was this doctor crazy or were they seriously given the miracle of another baby? They talked about the second chance they were given by God, the blessing it was to get the news they just got, it was all too good to be true. How would they explain this to the family? She was just pregnant a month ago with a completely different baby. It was so hard for Audrey to get pregnant before, but now she’s pregnant right after a miscarriage. Was this God’s way of saying, “sorry for the miscarriage, heres another”? How dangerous will this be for Audrey? The doctor told them all the dangers of this exact situation, now they’re living them.

The whole process had started again; baby names and gender games, their families hearing the jaw dropping news of Audrey’s astonishing pregnancy, Jasmine finding out the best news a second time, and menatlly preparing for this long journey.

 Audrey’s body beat the odds and was able to develop a healthy baby right after a miscarriage. The health risks and dangers her new pregnancy came with worried her, but she and her body pulled through. 

Nine months later, November 21, 2003, she gave birth to me, a baby girl she named after her husband. I wouldn’t have been born if my mom hadn’t lost the first baby, and the pain and agony she and my dad went through led to my life. The probability of me being here today were extremely slim, but here I am, explaining the whole story.