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Wondering Where Things Will Go
I remember it was the end of last year. Emma moved into her new house and we all were going over to see it. On arrival we were shocked by the grandness of the home. Emma greeted us as joyously as one could that just moved. We meandered our way through each corridor amazed with the architecture. We eventually made it up to Emma's room where we all decided to just chill and hangout as we normally would do. At the time my other friend had gotten a boyfriend who went to a different school than her and was a couple years older than her. So far their relationship seemed to be okay yet very rushed. As the friend in the situation I feel as though I see the relationship from the outside perspective and see the parts that those inside the relationship may be blinded by. As we were just sitting in Emma’s room the guy asks “ you think we’ll last?” me being a truthful person and also saw her go through at least 4 relationships over the summer I said “no.” Now I thought to myself as his facial expression became scarier I hope he takes this well. The energy in the room shifted as he became defensive and started calling me out on my mental health and that I’m “jealous” of the relationship because of how heartbroken one guy made me. I couldn’t comprehend how just me saying my opinion meant I could lose all of my friends. I felt lost after this event. I had no one to talk to; nothing to do. I slowly felt myself falling backing into the hole I felt I had just dug myself out of. I was now on the outside of the group having to deal with everyone together while I was at home under my blankets contemplating life. Everything started to feel pointless. I was skipping school, sleeping for days, yelling at my parents. Everything was spiraling out of control in my life. Until Emma realized the toxicity that was now taking place in the group since I was booted. She called me and dropped the bomb that she no longer felt happy with the people inside the group. She told me how tension built up in the group and she couldn’t stand talking bad about people behind their back especially when it was someone she cared about. This made all the difference for me because to know at least one person out of the group truly cared about me as a person. The group split and we became closer, hanging out everyday afterschool into the evening just to to it all again the next day. I’d have to say if it weren’t for that one person understanding the point I was at I don’t think I would be the person I am today.
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personal experience