I was 8 yearsold when I moved from Dubai to the US. It's a pretty big change. After being born in Dubai and living there for eight years, we moved across the world. The US, I would hear people saying, it’s the place where dreams come true, but honestly my 8 year old self was just excited about not wearing uniforms for school. 

Fashion was different 8 years ago, so what was cool in my eyes was the orange shirt with a seahorse on it, blue jeans, and black shoes that I wore to my first day of school. A 4 feet 10 inch girl that was about to step into Juarez Elementary and start a new life in a new school. 

My head down, walking into the classroom, I was the shyest person you could meet. As soon as I got in the class I overhear a student ask, "Another new student, why are we getting so many?" like I wasn't shy enough, now I also felt unwelcome, like an intruder. When you're in a situation you don't want to be in, you avoid it, right? Well I wanted to do the same. I wanted to run out of the room, but I knew I couldn't. Mrs. Johnson instructed me to take a seat in the back as she tried to introduce me to the class. 

It began with "Sep-edehh no sepdeh, wait how do you say your name?" 

"No, it's Se-pee-dah." My classmates faces full on confusion, I could tell they've never heard a name like mine. For the first time, I had to correct someone who mispronounced my name. In that moment I wished to be normal. 

In Dubai, everyone knew my name, so I never had to correct anyone; but, in the US, I never stopped. To this day I never have. When a new school year starts, when I go to the doctors or any event I still have to correct them.

After the awkward silence the speaker in the class went off and said, "Good morning everyone. Stand, face the flag, and place your right hand over your heart." OK WAIT, WHAT? 

Is this a ritual, what are we doing? Even though I didn't understand what was going on, my 8-year-old self followed the loud speackers instructions. What was I supposed to do? Then I hear "I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the..." Projecting in the class were words that I had never heard or understood. I glanced behind me to see if everyone was still standing, and Mrs. Johnson could see that I was confused out of my mind. I kinda made it obvious though, back then my facial expressions were practically talking for me. She walked up to me and told me to learn the words and memorize them. I listened to her and did what she told me to do, not like I could really go against her. 4 feet 10 inch girl vs a teacher, I would get knocked out. 

I didn't know how to fit in so the best thing an 8 year old could do was stay quiet. Classes were easy; I easily understood what was going on but I didn't understand why they were so easy. I found out a few years later that the classes I took in Dubai were all a level higher so I was learning things I already knew. 

After 3 classes it was lunchtime. Lunchtime was also challenging. I was looking for my sister, but we didn't eat lunch together because she was in a higher grade. Everyone had a circle of friends, except me. People would stare at me from a distance, piercing me. I yearned to fly away, to return home, to Dubai. I knew we werent going back but I also knew that I couldn't run. I learned how to be independent. 

When I returned home from my first day at school, I asked my parents, "Why did we move? I want to go home again!" They assured me that everything would be fine because this was our new home. I always trusted my parents, so I believed them.

 I had a reputation for being the class misfit in this new school. I never felt truly at home. I didn't believe I would, not until I go back to Dubai. While at school I never left my sister's side since I had no one else. She helped me survive, but after a year she had to start middle school."I was alone again," I thought, but honestly, looking back on it now, I'm glad I went through that experience because it helped me learn to depend on myself and taught me that I can't pretend to be someone I'm not. 

I taught myself to be independent and competitive cause I knew that if I didnt Id get crushed by the weight. 

It ultimately took me some time to find my place, but once I reached high school, I was able to surround myself with peers who understood me and on whom I could rely on without fear of being judged. Finally finding a place where I could be myself made me joyful.