A Rose Without Thorns, Still Called a Rose? | Teen Ink

A Rose Without Thorns, Still Called a Rose?

December 6, 2010
By Your_Beautiful_Lies SILVER, Cairo, New York
More by this author
Your_Beautiful_Lies SILVER, Cairo, New York
7 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Expirence is a brutal teacher, but we learn. My God do we learn."~C.S.Lewis








OR
What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière


The author's comments:
:D <3

~Chloe~
I sighed as I stepped into my last class of the day, taking a deep breath. I loved Potion's, it was the only class I really ever paid attention to. I took my seat next to Draco Malfoy, a blonde headed boy with an overly large ego. He slipped me a note asking if I would join him and his family for dinner after Graduation, I scribbled a quick yes.
Everyone hated the Potion's professor, Severus Snape, but I found him so....fascinating. I smiled as Professor Snape made his way inside, directions to our assignment appearing on the board as he sat behind his desk. My classmates and I went to work.
As the final bell was ringing we bottled up our potions, each labeled without names and shuffled off to the Great Hall for dinner. I plopped down next to Raven James at the Slytherin table, close to the professor's and even closer to Professor Snape. I tore my gaze away from the potions professor and ate, chatting away with classmates, complaining about the homework (which wasn't very hard at all) and just having a great time.
When dinner had ended everyone went to their common rooms to "sleep", I jumped straight into bed, and I wasn't very up to partying tonight. I drifted into a slumber:
I was peacefully drawing the Black Lake, sitting under that sad, little, limp tree by the edge of the lake. From the shadows emerged Fenrir Greyback, his hand caressed my cheek, sending a cold shiver down my spine. A scream became trapped beneath my pale lips...
I awoke, covered in a cold sweat, my alarm blaring. I groaned slamming it off, my whole body shaking. After a nice hot shower, I had finally calmed down enough to dress and reach down to the Great Hall for breakfast, being late for that showed today was not going to be a good day for me.
I sat down and starred down at my empty plate, my stomach churning at the mere thought of food. "What's wrong?" Raven leaned over and asked, I just shrugged. I sighed and looked up at Professor Snape; I was surprised to find his black eyes fixed on me. There was something different about him. Remorse? Love? I shook my head, impossible....
As the day went on I felt further and further away from everyone else. I walked along the corridor, on my way to Potion's {Late}, sliding my hands along the cold, stone walls. I slipped into class, thankful Professor Snape's back was turned, inches from my seat..... "Your twenty minutes late, Mrs. Winters. Detention! Take Your Seat..." He said, not even bothering to turn around.
"Detention?" I murmured. "Yes! Detention! Now Take Your Seat, Chloe!" I did as I was told. 'He never calls people by their first names...' I thought.
When the bell rang, I stayed behind.
I slowly stood from my seat and slumped over to his desk; he put down his paper and looked at me. "Mrs. Winter do you know why you are here?" He asked, staring at me, I nodded. "I was late for class, sir." "Yes. I do not want to see you fall behind." He said to me, I looked at the ground. I was so busy looking at the stone floor that I hadn't noticed Professor Snape stand and walk behind me. "You an amazing student, Chloe." He muttered, brushing the hair from my face, causing me to look up at him. The urge to kiss him burned so intensely inside her. "Yes, sir."
Before I knew what I was doing I had turned, leaned forward and softly kissed him AS I pulled back Professor Snape kissed me back, before finally letting me pull away. I slowly pulled my gaze back to the floor. I noticed his fits were clenched 'why..?' "Get...Out..." He choked out, I looked up once more and saw the one thing I never dreamed of seeing on his face, Tears, and they were sliding gently down his soft face. "Get. OUT!" He roared, I took off running, up the stairs, past the Great Hall, where everyone was eating; out the front doors and into the Forbidden Forest. I no longer cared that Death was waiting for me in the Forest; I just needed a place to be alone.

I couldn’t seem to pull myself together and soon my legs couldn’t hold me up, and I collapsed onto the hard ground of the forest floor. My face in my hands as tears slowly slid down my cheeks, leaving long streaks. I leaned me head against the trunk of a tree and closed my eyes, trying to pull myself together. “Hello beautiful...” A voiced purred in my ear, my eyes snapped open, I knew that voice. “Fenrir…” I checked out in my fear, but my fear soon faded and was replaced with slight happiness. Fenrir Greyback, the big bad werewolf of my time, he was my answer, he was my escape. His meaty hand reached out and wiped the tears from my cheeks. “No more tears my sweet; I will change your sorrow into something…better.” He said and smirked, I could feel his breath in my ear, his hand began to caress my frail, pale cheek and I couldn’t help but to tremble. “Please…don’t…” I said softly as his hand moved to my shirt, his large hands fumbling with the buttons. I screamed out. This wasn’t what I wanted, I didn’t want pleasure, and I wanted death. He quickly covered my mouth with his hand. “No, no my sweet, you’ll like this, I promise.” He said softly into my ear and chuckled, his chuckle was dark and sadistic.





~Snape~

I sat in my office, grading essays of my students, who seemed not to get the concept of Potions, a fair few did, but I would have liked more. My head snapped up to look out the window once I head, what I thought to be a scream. I shook my head and continued to grade essays, before I heard it again. “What in Merlin…?” I said and placed my quill down in my ink pot and threw on my cloak. I made my way down and out of the castle, I looked about outside and spotted a faint light coming from somewhere in the Forbidden Forest. “Teenagers…” I muttered and made me way into the Forbidden Forest. As I came closer to where the light was coming from, the screams became louder and louder. What I laid my eyes upon; I would never be able to forget. I could my heart drop as I looked upon the scene. “Let. Her. Go. Fenrir!”






~Chloe~

I could feel Fenrir remove his hand from my mouth and I slowly opened my eyes, my vision was blurred from tears, but I could make out what looked to be a figure. The figure lifted its want and shot a spell at Fenrir, who shot backwards into a tree. The figure came closer to me and I backed into a tree. “Please, please, d-don’t.” I stuttered out. “Don’t worry Chloe, your safe now.” That voice, I knew that voice. “Severus?” I asked softly as I was gathered in someone’s arms. “Yes. Now shh. Sleep and this will all be over.” He said in my ear, sending shivers down my spine, I sighed happily and closed my eyes, drifting into a sweet slumber.






~Snape~

I couldn’t help but to mentally kick myself as I carried Chloe out of the Forbidden Forest, she looked as peaceful as she slept in my arms. I wondered what Fenrir wanted with her? What was so important about Fenrir Greyback having Chloe Winters under his arm? I sighed and shook my head as I kicked open the front doors to the Castle. To my luck Minerva was doing her shift of rounds in the corridors. “Minerva!” I called out to her, she turned around to see who called her and once she laid eyes upon Chloe in my arms she gasped and came running. “Severus,” She said, “What…what has happened to Mrs. Winters?” She asked pushing Chloe’s hair from her face. “I’m not all sure; maybe she had a fight with someone. All I know is that I found her in the Forbidden Forest, Fenrir Greyback had her in his hold, if I wasn’t there…” A trailed off feeling tears sting my eyes. “Ahh, take her to the infirmary.” She said. “I’ll get Albus.” And soon I was left alone in the corridor, with Chloe asleep and hurt in my arms. I knew of her injuries and made sure not to make them any worse as I slowly walked to the infirmary.
I was met at the door by Albus, Minerva, and Madam Pomfrey. “Ahh, the poor dear. Lay her on the bed Severus.” Madam Pomfrey said as she grabbed different vials and jars and went to work on Chloe and her wounds. I stared at her, lying there, so vulnerable for a long moment before walking back to Albus and Minerva. “Severus, what could Fenrir be doing here? Near the castle?” Minerva asked me, concern in her voice. “I do not know Minerva.” I turned towards Albus. “Albus, promise me you will have someone keep guard on her. Not that I do not trust this castle but I worry about this girl…” Albus nodded, he could clearly see where my worry was coming from, he understood completely. “Of course Severus, just as a precaution.” He said and winked at me once Minerva had turned her back. “Severus, don’t let your heart get the best of you…” He whispered in my ear before leaving with Minerva, leaving me, Chloe, and Madam Pomfrey. I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair, what was I going to do? I couldn’t let my heart speak for me, but my heart seemed to be wining this battle. I sat down in one of the chairs next to Chloe’s bed and before I thought about it, I took her hand in mine and waited for the girl to wake.

The author's comments:
<3

I slowly opened my eyes and looked around; I saw tons of hospital beds. I was in the infirmary. I pulled myself into a sitting position and that’s when I heard it, soft breathing coming from from the chair next to me, I looked over and stopped once I saw someone holding my hand. I knew those hands, those hands…… I shoved the owner of the hands lightly. “Professor?” I muttered softly trying to wake him but not startle him, his eyes fluttered open. “Chloe…?” He smiled. “H-how do you feel?” He asked me, slowly dropping my hand and standing up to look at me. “I feel great, actually.” He smiled and placed a dress and a few other things on my lap. “Good, now I do believe you need to get ready. Graduation starts in less than an hour.” He smirked and walked out, his black robes billowing out behind him. I couldn’t help but to smile, he could always make me smile with the simplest of things.
Once I came out of the bathroom from changing into my graduation dress I was surprised to find Raven standing in the doorway. “Well well to hell and back.” I couldn’t help but to chuckle, she was never one to be mean, let alone sound mean. “Yes, from Fenrir’s evil clutches to my princes arms.” I grinned and took my wand from the table, making a beautiful rose corsage on my wrist. “So, my love struck friend, are you ready to graduate?” Raven asked with a slight smirk on her face, I returned her smirk. “Of course I am.” I held out my arm to her. “Shall we doll?” I asked as she linked her arm with my and we walked out to the field by the lake for our ceremony.
As the ceremony took place I couldn’t stop myself from looking around at the crowd’s of people and professors watching, I was looking for my savior, my prince and my love, but he was nowhere to be found and I could feel my hopes sinking. I looked to see the headmaster looking at me, a gleam in his eyes, he nodded to me and then looked off far in the left hand corner and once I turned around I found myself watching black silken hair bobbing away.
The ceremony ended and I took off running to Professor Snape’s room, as I slowly myself to the door it swung open and I was pulled inside the room. My eyes blinked and finally adjusted to the dim light. “Chloe… how do you feel my dear?” He whispered softly in my ear, I could tell he was only a mere few inches away from me. “I’m so much better. I escaped death because of you, you saved my life Professor and I cannot thank you enough.” I said smiling, not sure if he could see my smile in the dim lighting. I felt his arms go around me for the quickest room, he was still holding back. “I’m just glad you’re alright Chloe.” He said and handed me a piece of paper. “Promise to owl me often.” He said and opened his door. “But now, I believe you have a dinner to go to Chloe.” He whispered before putting his hand on the small of my back and leading my out back into the corridor. “I’ll be waiting for you owl.” He said and closed the door. I left to go meet Draco, smiling like some babbling idiot.
“Chloe! There you are!” I heard Draco yell from the pitch, I turned around to look at him and had to stop myself from cringing when I saw Lucius Malfoy, the scoundrel, if only his wife knew… Draco walked up to me and put his arm around my shoulders, whispering in my ear. “Just don’t give him a reason and it won’t happen.” I wanted to scream and tell him everything I knew of his father, but I had no time because we had made it to his parents. “Mom, Dad, This is Chloe Winters.” He said introducing us briefly. “So wonderful to meet you dear!” Narissca, Draco’s mother said giving me a quick, tight hug, I smiled. “Pleased to meet you, Mrs. Winters my dear.” Lucius said as he kissed my hand gently, I held back a gag. “Nice to meet you.” I replied back to the pair of them. Draco took my hand and we were off, apperating to Malfoy manor in an instant.
Draco and I went off to the parlor, always our favorite spot when we hung out at his house, although I thought it quiet strange that this was the first time his parent met me, but then I remember the were too busy with the Dark Lord. We talked about quidditch and what we would do now that we graduated. “Dinner!” Narissca called to us about an hour and half later, I knew that this meal would be hard for me to eat; the Malfoy family was one of the few families that still used house elves. I smiled and took a seat between Draco and Lucius, which almost made me scowl, the man was... I couldn’t even think of a word to describe him. Although it was sad to admit, the dinner was delightfully prepared and mouthwateringly delicious. I couldn’t take another minute in that house; I couldn’t take another minute of that man’s eyes looking me over. I bid my farewells to Narissca and Draco and before I could do the same to Lucius he blurted out, “I’ll walk you out to the gate my dear.” I could see the sly smirk playing on his lips, I turned to Draco as he linked his arm with mine and slowly walked me away, I mouthed the words ‘Help Me’ to him and I could see the sad look in his eyes.
Walking with Lucius wasn’t to terrible, he talked about his garden which I always admired and how he accrued his peacocks in his front lawn, but what happened once we reached the gate I would never forget. “Well thank you for having my Mr. Malfoy.” I said to him turning to open the gate. “Please call me Lucius.” He said turning me back to face him, his lips gently brushed mine and I gasped in surprise, which he was taking for pleasure. He went in for another kiss but I turned away, opened the gate and dissaperated to my home. Once there I flopped onto my bed and cried, it was all I could think to do. An owl fluttered into my room holding a note from Draco. ‘What happened? –Draco’ It took me some time to reply to Draco but a few hours later I did. ‘He kissed me and tried to go for more, but I left. I’m fine, it’d fine. I expected this. ~Chloe’ I sent the note back with his own owl and drifted to a sweet, dreamless slumber.

~Snape~

It had been a good eleven days since the graduation of Chloe Winters and still I had yet to receive even one single shot little blip of an owl, at first I started to think that this was just some stupid fling she had for me, but I knew that was impossible to be true and I soon thought of the worst possible thing. That was when Chloe’s great barn owl flew in through my open window. ‘S.S, Sorry I have yet to owl you, I had some trouble at the graduation dinner with Lucius. Do not worry about it, all is well. How are you? Though this may be wrong to say, I miss you. ~With Love, Chloe’ the owl made me smile, I tucked it into my robe pocket and took a piece of parchment and quill in my hand and thought of what to right back. ‘Chloe, I miss you as well, you should come visit me sometime. I’d like that very much. With Lucius? Please tell me what happened, I need to know. ~Severus P.S Please you’ve graduated now, call me Severus ‘ I sent the owl on its way with the small hope that Chloe would ask to visit me tonight.




~Chloe~

The past hour I had been sending Owl’s back and forth with Severus, I shivered every time I used his name, I still wasn’t use to calling him that. I sat in my study, taping my quill on my head as I thought of what to say next. ‘Severus, Why don’t I come over now, and tell you instead of telling you in an owl? I believe it would be much better for you and I. ~Chloe’ I sighed and watched my great barn owl fly away into the growing night. I couldn’t help but to stand and pace about my study, I was afraid of Severus’s reply. What if he said no? I shook my head, not even wanting to think of such a thing. Soon Severus’s cute owl fluttered into my study and handed my two pieces of parchment, as I read I gently petted his owl. ‘Chloe, You coming now? That would be quite wonderful! I would enjoy seeing you and I must hear of this thing with Lucius. Attached is my address, I hope you find your way alright. ~Severus’

The owl, both the one with his kind words and the one with his address scribbled on the back made me smile; he always brought me great happiness. I nuzzled my owl back into his cage, leaving the door open anyway and grabbed my cloak, sling it on I dissaperated to the address provided for me from Severus. As I walked up along the houses looking for the number scribble I couldn’t help but to notice all the people stare at me. Once I found the number scribbled down on the parchment I hesitantly knocked on the door, hoping that this was the correct house. I door soon slowly opened to revel Severus in the doorway.





~Snape~

Sitting in my chair waiting for Chloe I couldn’t help but to smile, she made me so happy. A knock on my door made me jump from my chair and spring towards the door. I peeked my head out and asked “Who is it?” without looking. “Me Severus.” A voice I knew so well chimed in from the other side of the door. I moved aside and let the figure in, I could tell the figure was female but my mind had yet to process who it actually was. I watched as she hung up her coat and stood there, looking at me.





~Combined~


“I’ve missed you Severus…” Once those words left her mouth he knew who it was, who had come to visit him and who now stood right in front of him. “I’ve missed you as well Chloe.” He said as he smiled warmly, looking at her with shinning eyes. He blinked to snap himself from his phase of amazement and swooped his hand towards the living room. “Please, Chloe sit, make yourself at home.” He smiled as he followed her to the living room, taking a seat on the couch as she took a seat on the arm chair, crossing her legs right over left. “Would you like some tea or coffee or something?” He asked her at the ready to get up, she shook her head. “No, thank you though. How have you been Severus?” She asked him as she looked around, trying to avoid his eyes. “I have been well. Yourself?” “I’ve been…fine.” She said with a slight smile. “So Chloe please tell me what happened at Malfoy manor, with Lucius.” Severus asked her calmly, trying to get her to look into his eyes. “Well…” She sighed and looked into his eyes as she began to tell him the story. “I went to Malfoy manor for dinner after our graduation from school, it was fairly normal we ate and talked, but Lucius wouldn’t stop staring at me. When I said that I must get home Lucius jumped up and said ‘Allow me to escort you out my dear’. I really didn’t want him to do such a thing but I could not protest with the man, the walk to the front gate was normal until I had my hand on the gate handle. He grabbed me and kissed me; I fought myself away and took off for home. Oh Severus, it was so terrible!” She could feel tears springing to her eyes.

What happened next, shocked she for such a thing had never happened before, and Severus hugged her close. “Chloe,” She could hear the anger in his voice. “I’m so sorry, I’m here for you. I won’t let that happen to you ever again.” Chloe blinked to keep the tears away. “What? R-really?” She couldn’t help but to smile; Severus stood up and turned so he was facing her. “I’ve never felt like this before, I didn’t think I could love, but I’m in love with you Chloe.” Severus said and pulled her close and kissed her. It was a burst of light behind Chloe’s retinas when he kissed her. Before she knew it, she had fainted.





~Severus~

I let out a sigh as my lips left Chloe’s. I wasn’t afraid to show my love, finally. She would know. A loud ‘thump’ caught my attention, I looked down and saw Chloe, and she had fainted. So many things began running through my mind, ‘Was I that bad?’ ‘Do I need kissing lessons?’ I shook my head, lifted Chloe into my arms and carried her upstairs, laying her down on my bed.

Waiting was killing him, why wasn’t she awake yet? Was she dead!? I started to panic, dread and fear filled me and then her eyes fluttered open, staring at me with those beautiful violet eyes of hers.





~Combined~

Chloe’s eyes fluttered open and she slowly looked around, at first her mind was blank and she felt like a cloud. “Chloe?” That voice…she knew that voice…Severus. Everything came flooding back to her, the meeting and the kiss, she had fainted. She sat up and looked at him ‘I must be in his room…’ she thought. She smiled as she looked at him. “Severus?” She asked, her voice cracking a little. “Yes?” He answered, looking at her like something vile was pouring from her mouth. “I love you.” She wasn’t sure if she should say it to him but she did anyway. “You…you do?” He asked looking at her, he smiled softly, and Chloe thought she was in a dream.

She pinched herself and sucked in a breath, ‘Nope! Real’. “Chloe, it, well it tends to get a bit lonely here, with all this space all alone. So, you know I was uh well wondering if maybe you’d like to stay here, with me? I mean, you’d have your own room.”Severus said looking at her intensely. Chloe’s mouth hung open before she remembered he was waiting for her to answer. “Oh uh... Of course.” She said breathlessly. He smiled and took her hand, leading her down the hall to an empty room. “There’s a fresh bed, a desk, lamp night stand and a wardrobe. I am…” He cut his sentence off and looked into her eyes, Chloe stepped closer and placed her hand on his cheek before kissing him. Severus’s hand snaked around her waist and pulled her close, their bodies pressing against one another.

They pulled apart and he glance at the clock. “It’s getting late…” He took off his shirt and handed it to her. “You should sleep… You can sleep in that if you’d like.” He said before leaving. Chloe threw off her clothes and pulled on his shirt, she laid in bed, snuggling inside the shirt. She took a breath of his cologne and feel asleep, her thoughts clear and blank for the first time in a long time.

The author's comments:
Short sorry. :/

Slowly waking to bright sunlight peeking through my window I stifled a yawn and slowly sat up, looking around trying to remember where I was. I knew one thing was sure; I was not in my house. What had happened last night? I could barley recall it all. I blinked looking at the messy room I was in, I looked down to the shirt I was wearing, Who’s shirt is this? I wondered smelling it. Smelling it was the key, everything from last night came flooding back to me. The graduation weeks before, followed by that terrible dinner and seeing him again, he had asked me to live with him, what had I said? Yes. I had said yes to his offer. Remembering this made me smile as a small knock came upon the door to the room I was in. “Come in.” I said softly as I pulled the covers over my bare legs. I smiled seeing Severus walk inside. “How did you sleep?” He asked walking over and sitting next to me on the bed. "Very well thank you." I said smiling softly at him as his hand took mine, squeezing gently. He leaned close to my ear and whispered, "I love you." His words sent shivers down my spine. But before I knew it he had stood up and walked out the door. "Oh, by the way.." He said poking his head in the doorway. "Come down for breakfast when your ready." He said and left, closing the door behind him. I hopped out of bed and quickly got dressed in fresh clothes and did my hair all with a simple flick of my wrist. I grinned and skipped down the stairs, I stood there at the foot of the stairwell eyes wide. I had never seen a more beautifully prepared meal in my life. "Wow...."



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JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This book has 8 comments.


on May. 21 2015 at 12:03 am
SierraSpears BRONZE, Lingle, Wyoming
4 articles 0 photos 12 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Maybe there's something you're afraid to say, or someone your afraid to love, or somewhere you're afraid to go. It's gonna hurt. It's gonna hurt because it matters." - John Green

So I'm a Harry Potter fan and I am unusually very adapted to this story. I love your write style but it's just a tad rushed. Otherwise, this is absolutely awesome! Didn't think I'd like something like this. But I do! Great work! Keep it up!

on Nov. 6 2011 at 12:41 pm
cantdeleteaccounthelp, Sey, West Virginia
0 articles 0 photos 64 comments
I support the comments above. It's a little unrealistic and messed up a few things but it is very nice. Write more! I want to know what is happens...

on Aug. 16 2011 at 10:18 am
Your_Beautiful_Lies SILVER, Cairo, New York
7 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Expirence is a brutal teacher, but we learn. My God do we learn."~C.S.Lewis








OR
What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière

Yeah, this book is still a work in progress. The reasons to her hateful spite towards Lucius is coming very soon, as well as the reasons behind why Fenrir gets to her so well. :)

on Aug. 2 2011 at 5:52 pm
Secretlypoetic GOLD, Hastings, Michigan
14 articles 0 photos 31 comments
This book was interesting, but also very unrealistic... I would be very interested to know why she already hated Lucius, and why Fenrir was able to get to her. I like your writing style though!

on Jun. 14 2011 at 7:46 am
Your_Beautiful_Lies SILVER, Cairo, New York
7 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Expirence is a brutal teacher, but we learn. My God do we learn."~C.S.Lewis








OR
What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière

Haha Yes I know there was the how Wizarding Worl battle, but I didn't want so much drama in the begining so I cut that out. xD And thank you, your nice comments make me write more. :)

on May. 21 2011 at 9:24 pm
SilentlyRising GOLD, Decatur, Georgia
13 articles 0 photos 100 comments

Favorite Quote:
"My pen is the barrel of the gun. Remind me which side you should be on."

This was a wonderful story.  I liked it very much, but there is one thing that irks me a little.  Around Draco's graduation time, there was the whole Hogwarts battle, and Snape died.  That's my only real problem.  Unless Draco was a year younger than her...?  Although, I don't think the years mix during classes.  Your writing style was very good.  Keep up the good work.  Write on!

on Jan. 19 2011 at 10:39 am
Your_Beautiful_Lies SILVER, Cairo, New York
7 articles 0 photos 14 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Expirence is a brutal teacher, but we learn. My God do we learn."~C.S.Lewis








OR
What saves a man is to take a step. Then another step. It is always the same step, but you have to take it. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars, 1939, translated from French by Lewis Galantière

I wanted to base this story on a rare thing that happens to some young girls to rais peoples awareness on it. :)


Ys sorry about that i got all worked up in my writing and often forget! :O

More is coming!


on Jan. 14 2011 at 7:21 pm
bahannahpeel PLATINUM, Bloomington, Illinois
27 articles 0 photos 73 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Schools corrupt the mind." The Loco Focos

I liked this story, it kind of freaked me out a little though. Is Chloe exceptionally beautiful, so all the older men want a go at her?

Also, somtimes in the first person you used 'he'. I know that can get confusing--I do it all the time!

I liked it. the ending was a bit unrealistic, but good. Is there more? I'd love to read it