I'll Stay | Teen Ink

I'll Stay

January 14, 2020
By DingHMai, Richmond Hill, New York
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DingHMai, Richmond Hill, New York
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Author's note:

I've always loved happy tragedies as a middle schooler. Ever since I read manga's like Pandora's Heart and Angel Beats, I've developed a love for this gloomy bright mood. My story is tied closely to my emotions. It's more of a story to find myself, so the grammar is off every there and now - So please forgive me a little for that. I wanted to find myself, to find in me the thing that I have nearly left behind. Throughout the entire story, I kept thinking and thinking about what I was looking for(who the man was meeting) and it took quite a lot of turns before I realized what I was looking for, a part of myself.

The skies were painted dark blue with no clouds nor bird to detract us from its endless splendor. Far out, beyond the horizon, a flock of stars flickered on and off, grew smaller and smaller every passing hour. 

“Hahhhh…” a man sighed out. 

“How am I going to face her? Should I start with a joke? Hey sweets, how’s it been? Nah, that's pretty lame. Should I...” the man spoke to himself. 

The traffic light turned yellow and the man slowly loosened his foot on the pedal. He soon came to a stop right before the stop line at the traffic light flickered red. 

The world was silent. There were no people to fill the streets with chatter, no birds to fill the streets with song, no cars to fill the streets with clamor, and no lights to fill the street with glamor. The hum of the man's car alone filled the world’s hole. 

The man looked around. All the shops around had their metal shutters pulled down with a few hanging a “We Are Closed” sign right next to it.

 The trees which had once stood proudly along the roadside flaunting their beautiful greens and robust trunk, now stood darkened and bare, dressed with nothing but the cold air.

The traffic light then flickered green. With another big sigh, the man presses down on the gas pedal.  

SCREECH! The man stomped down on the brakes before he could get past the traffic light. 

There, in front of the car were two brown birds. Falcons. One limped across the street as the other hopped around in front, going back and forth to nuzzle the limping one’s face as if cheering it on to keep ongoing.

“Haha,” the man chuckled in a light-hearted manner. “So you too huh?” he said as he looked at the front.

The man watched them cross the street and onto the sidewalk. As they disappeared into an alleyway, the man again presses down on the gas pedal and slowly rides down the empty streets.

Buildings wissed by as the man drove down the street. 

Soon, he slows down to make a turn at a corner.

“Aw.” The man whispered out. He looked at a shop, with the heading “Papa José’s Flower Shop” closed down with it’s stand bare, and a small red sign hanging on the glass door “Closed”.

“Guess I gotta pick some dandelions off the roadside now” the man snickered to himself. 

The man took a deep breath, and turned the steering wheel.

“Well, wish you well José” he lets out a deep sigh, revved up the engine, and with drops of tears flowing down onto his pants, he drove out of the city.


The man slowly stepped onto the breaks as he began to park.

 It was a rural neighborhood, the green lawns laid across the earth as far as the eye can see with the city a distant figure. However, the dandelions which once littered the fields yellow, were now specs of pollen dotted every here and there in the vast greens. 

The man stopped in front of a small gray house. The man looked at himself with the car’s side-mirror as the car engines hummed faintly in the background.

“Okay man. Remember the line. Remember to smile” he says to himself as he tugs the corners of his mouth upward. He presses the car keys and the engines hum slowly faded away. He got out of his car and a sudden chill hits him.

“ACHOO!” the man sneezed. “Jesus Christ, if it’s going to be this cold in the summer, how am I gonna last winter?” the man remarked as he puts on his white hoodie. He slammed the car door shut and began walking toward the house. 

“Hm, a postcard, neat” he commented as he checked inside the mailbox. 

He stood on the doorstep right before the house which now towered above him. 

He lets out a deep white breath, which was instantly swept away by the icy winds.

And he pressed the doorbell.

Silence. Only the shrill of the frigid wind answered his call.

He pressed the doorbell once more, and no answer. 

“Hah…” he looked down and laughed in the silence.

He turned around and started heading back to his car.

Thump! The sudden sound of something hitting something broke the silence. The man stopped dead in his tracks with his handheld to his chest. The loud thumps grew nearer and nearer, and then a small crash followed. The man’s heart was racing. “What should I say? What should I do?” the man whacked his brain to come up with something. 

Thump! Thump! The sound was finally at the door, and the door swung open.

A small girl, no taller than 4 feet, with long gray hair, wearing an oversized t-shirt, and grasping onto a gray duckling stuffed animal stood at the entrance, huffing and puffing out white puffs of air.

“I’m... home” the man croaked out, holding back his tears.

The child stepped onto the pavement with her barefoot and tripped, falling flat on her stomach. She quickly pushed herself up and leaped into the man's arm, and the man bent down embraced her in his arms.

She planted herself into the man's shoulders and tightly gripped onto the back of his shirt.

The man hugged her back, whispering “It’s okay now. I’m not going anywhere”.

A warm wet feeling started growing on the man's shoulder. He hugged her tighter and she clung harder. She cried out “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. Because of me. Because of me!”. He kissed her on the head and slowly stroked her head from the back.

“It’s not your fault. If it’s anyone's fault, it’s me and your mama’s fault” He said as he continued stroking her hair. “But! But! But!” she wailed out.

“It’s alright. It’s alright” he repeated as she continued crying in his arms.


He slowly laid her down onto the sofa. She was sound asleep. Looking at her closely, she had dark black circles under her eyes and her lips were shaded gray with cracks forming all around. He noticed her wrists, there was a small cut around it.

He stroked her head one more time, and kissed her on the forehead and whispered “Good night, I’m here now” before heading back downstairs.

Bzz. Bzz. The television flashed on and a lady appeared on the screen.

“Humanity has now moved onto the stars. For those who have either not met the requirements to board the ships or have decided to stay, we will come back once we have found a suitable planet to settle upon. Godspeed---Bzz. Bzz. Humanity has now moved onto-” SNAP!



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