Over the duration of this past month (especially this past week), I've been doing some searching. It isn't searching for myself because I believe I've come to know myself quite well, but more like searching for how I'm going to focus on my goals, trying to narrow down focuses to exactly what I desire truly to come out of this life, and how I'm going to apply this knowledge and growing maturity I've come to realize I possess.
I am under no belief that I have fully become Sunshyne. I am still growing, and I've come to feel I need to grow towards something. The idea that I'm still in the shade, and in order for me to grow straight and tall I must find a light to grow towards.
To find this light, I must find the meaning of living. It sounds cliche, but these thoughts within me feel completely real and not fake in any way shape or form. The masses would argue that the meaning of life is the serving of God. I believe in no such thing and believe not that it is through ignorance that I've come to this conclusion. Just as a christian states their belief I state this belief as mine.
Well, then what is the meaning? I asked myself this after coming to the firm conclusion that a God is not what I'm meant to serve. Then what am I to serve?
I've come to the conclusion that is the catalyst in all my actions in a wide scope view on my life, and it is this:
The meaning of life is to fulfill pleasure.
Many others have come to this conclusion before me, saying things such as live life to the fullest and what not, but realizing this myself feels more ground breaking to my own well being.
With this conclusion I analyzed it further to ensure that this is the true meaning for myself. If this is the meaning then who or what am I to serve? And I've seen through the basic format of life that this changes at different maturity levels and stages of life.
The first stage is the child stage where in order to fulfill this meaning of pleasure, it must be done for you. Adults are to help you fulfil your pleasure and happiness and what you serve is yourself. This is the beginning of the selfishness that one must keep their entire life to ensure they fulfilll their meaning. It sounds odd that selfishness would be a characteristic one must contain in order to be happy but it is the truth as I know it.
The second stage to fulfilling this meaning is gauged by age and maturity. At a certain age one starts to see that life is better lived with someone else and so they go in search for this person and their second stage begins. This is the immature route to the second stage. In the second stage, in order to fulfill this meaning of pleasure one sees they must be selfish and work towards their own happiness and also obtain happiness and pleasure with someone else. I see parts of this formula as immature and wrong, but what this is what the masses seem to do. I believe that the second stage is determined by maturity and that it should begin when one has come to know their complete self and doesn't search for another person strictly because it would improve life (even though this aspect also exists) but also for added selfish reasons, and this stage must be carried out by continuing to be selfish in fulfilling happiness but adding that one must help the other person fulfill their selfish goals in this life but also LIMITING a great deal of starting to fulfil the meaning of life together. I FIRMLY belive that at the second stage of the fulfilment of life's meaning that two peoples' meaning should remain SEPERATE in order to ensure that both meaning of pleasure are truly fulfilled. This is where the masses go wrong.
The third stage is started by an individual realizing that most of their happiness and their partners happiness is fulfilled, and they decide to chain this happiness into another being. This stage is about limiting selfish advancements, limiting helping advance your partners hapiness and beginning to help the helpless fulfill their happiness, a Child. The third stage is one of the two most fulfilling of stages.
The fourth stage begins when the third ends, when one is no longer needed by a child. Although your selfish happiness fulfillments are almost full as are your partners, the MATURE route takers can partake in the happiness fulfillment that the masses started at the underdeveloped second stage, and that is the fufill of happiness with your partner. By waiting for this happiness fulfillment, one has gained advantages. They have felt fulfilled and satisfied with where their life has taken them and therefore truly commit to the happiness of another. One also has gained a feeling of togetherness with their partner by waiting and by also going through the third stage together. This is the other most fulfilling of stages if one had taken the mature scope on the development of one's happiness. Now one can serve not just themselves but the unit they have created.
The fifth stage is determined by fate. It is the end of life. By following this scope of meaning one can die feeling fulfilled I believe.
This is all my own belief and the way that I'm deciding to try and fulfill my life. Things may change but I see this as satisfying for myself. I know I must live out my dreams and do everything that I want to because I only have one life and I'm deciding to give it meaning.