recently i feel like i have not been smiling as much as i used to...i have just been really down recently...i have never really felt this down for this long before... i just feel like laying down with someone i truly love and crying in their arms until i fall asleep...i guess...now that im single i feel that im even more alone then i was, even though im the one that broke it off and i always complained, saying i wanted to be single again (not to her)...*sigh*...i guess i will never find my Souta (a character in my story always let his girlfriend cry in his arms) especially when i keep pushing the people i date away... i hate me