5th Twilight: Glistening Sin (Renesmee's Story) Chapter 2 | Teen Ink

5th Twilight: Glistening Sin (Renesmee's Story) Chapter 2

October 25, 2009
By dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments

chapter 2

My eye lids were suddenly drowned with sunlight. It startled me to the point that I had to open my eyes to see what it was. But I guess it was brighter than it seemed . My golden locks of hair were velcroed to my sheets and my fore head was covered with sweat bullets from my previous nightmare. I leaned forward and gazed around my room that had grasped the suns rays almost instantly after I opened my shades. My skin was twinkling in the light and it almost made me impressed to be me, but then I got over my ego. My room was painted a dark shade of purple and fluttering butterflies swirled across my border that was posted at top of my walls. My crib was hand painted by Grandma. It was a bright teal color which reminded me of Jacob and I going to la Push and skipping rocks across the waves. Well mine were rocks Jacob's were boulders. My crib was his muscular figure twirling me round and round. It was his cocoa eyes, his shaggy hair.

My bedroom door was open and I could see the hallway wall outside my room with our family photo hanging on it. Daddy and Mommy were both kissing me on my cheeks. Dad kissing me on the left, Mom on the right. I was smiling in the middle, my hair was flowing down past the cut off of the picture.

I was curious to see if they were out of the bedroom yet. Mom had told me last night that they had somethings to do while I was sleeping. I'm guessing paperwork or something.

"Momma? Are you done with that work you had to do? I'm up!" I whispered this so quietly you could probably hear Auntie Alice walk into the room. I had no reason to yell it. Momma could hear that whisper from a mile away.

"Uhh... just a sec Nessie I need to get dresss... uh get my shoes on. " she said quietly back at me. I could hear a lot to, but I guess my dad said I am a very hard sleeper and never wake up until the sun rises, once I fall asleep. How would he know that? Did he put a air horn next to my ear and blow it or something?

"Ok" I muttered. In an instant they were both standing at my door. Dad smiling wonderfully, Mom as well. I hopped out of the crib and walked torwards them. I hugged them both at the knees because I could not reach any farther. I stared up and saw a smile from both of them. They stared at each other for a moment and then Dad said to her, "Maybe when we get in the car."

Ever since mom learned how too let Dad into her mind, I could never understand their conversations. It made me angry and I stared frustrated at both of them and of course, they laughed, knowing what I just thought.

"It's not funny!" I exclaimed

"We are not laughing at you Nessie." Dad said "It's just we are excited thats all."

"For what?" I asked, curious now.

"It's a surprise." Mom answered with a shining grin on her face.

"Ok well I will get dressed with my new wardrobe and I will meet you outside to go to get some breakfast. I am feeling for a little A positive, hopefully Grandpa has some." I smiled, so did they and then they were gone and out of sight talking in the living room.

I glided towards my walk in closet and was surprised to see what Auntie Alice had provided for me. Ahh Gucci, Chanel, and Juicy Couture filled the air. I could not believe all the new clothing that was in there. I decided to go with something casual. Chanel boots, Gucci skinny jeans, and a Juicy Couture top with a white tiger imprinted on it fit the bill.

I slid off my pajamas and something shiny caught my eye. It was the heart locket my mom had gotten for me for Christmas last year which dangled around my pale neck. I adored that piece and would just crumble if I lost it. I slid on my clothes and snatched my pack that I wore everywhere I went. Ever since my mom gave it to me on that day of misery when the Volturi came, it was cemented to my back.

I walked out of my room and into the hallway to see Mom and Dad waiting for me. They were sitting in the cozy seat and they had the fire going. It was so warm compared to the weather we had been having. These snow storms were crazy.

"Ready Ness?" Daddy asked as he reached out for me to grab his hand.

I did and then exclaimed,"Always."

He grinned and then slung me onto his back. We flew out our wooden door and raced to the mansion. The freezing cold nipped my nose and it felt nice at first but then it became just plain cold. Mom was right behind me drifting back and forward, left to right. It seemed like she was having fun. I know I was having fun watching her.

The temperature outside made Daddy's skin feel warm it felt so warm it was comforting. He turned around and laughed. He had just heard me. Gosh I need to keep my thoughts to a minimum. It must be hard for him to listen to every single persons thoughts and their voices when they speak out loud. I wonder how bad it is at a restaurant. He turned around and grinned again."You can tune the voices out sometimes if they are not to loquacious." I laughed really hard on that one.

We were almost to the mansion when Mom started to speed up and shouted, "Catch me if you can!"
Dad shot back a grin and said, "I'l try not to embarrass you love."
So then it was on. Mom and Dad were neck and neck for a while but on the last stretch of land, Dad push it even harder and Mom could not keep up, Dad won.

"Veterans luck." My mom said under her breath.

"No, just years of practice, you''ll get it love" he answered.

As the bickering was happening we appeared at the front step of the house. I jumped off his back and opened the door myself. This was my house too. Grandpa was watching football with Uncle Em and they were so into it they had not even noticed us walking threw the door. Aunt Rosie was reading some magazine that had a picture of Taylor Swift on the front cover. Then of course Auntie Alice was running downstairs to greet us,"Hey Bella, hey Edward, why hello Renesmee how are you? I heard that you had a surprise toda. That I had no idea about." That last part she glared at Daddy, and he grinned. Jacob I guess was stalking us from behind because he flew threw the door. "Ok, ya ready?" He asked. "Wait you told the dog and not me?" Alice was fuming.

"Well Alice the only reason he knew before you is that he thought of the idea." Answered Daddy with a puzzeled look.
"Wow I never knew he had the brains to think this one up. Good job Scooby -Doo." Aunite Alice never seemed to like Jacob and I never knew why.

"They just like to have creative discussions thats all." Daddy whispered to me.

I nodded my head and then said to everyone epescially Auntie Alice and Jake, "Sorry to interrupt but I am really hungry."
In an instant Grandpa was standing next to me. He took my hand and led me to the kitchen. He sat me down on one of the stools that was seated by the bar and asked me, " What can I get you nessie?"

"Well I would enjoy some A positive please." I said with my hand on my tummy I was always hungry at this house.

"You are just in luck my darling. I just picked some up at the hospital yesterday." As Grandpa was talking, he got out a steel cup and a blood packet from the cupboard . He then opened the packet and slowly poured the blood into the cup without any hesitation. I stared at the red liquid as it slid out of the bag it was in. It looked like silk as it smoothly poured.

I had the urge to ask Grandpa something for a very long time. I decided right now was the perfect time to do so,"Grandpa, if you never leave this house except for work and hunting how do you relax?"

He chuckled at my random question and then replied with, "Well Ness, I know it sounds odd but hunting is my relaxation. The ability to run as fast as my legs will take me is the only way I can let go of everything I am stressed about . Just being able to do whatever on my own time is wonderful. Letting go of the thirst that us as good vampires have to cope with is like releasing pressure from a balloon that is about to burst." He said this so calm that it was surprising that he actually was saying those words. If you were not listening to what he was saying you might have thought he was just telling you what football team was playing tonight on T.V.

That was all we said as I slurped down the blood slowly. After I was Finished I got up and me, Mom, Jacob, and Daddy left to go see my surprise


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This article has 107 comments.

Maia said...
on Feb. 26 2010 at 1:07 pm
I am so absolutely sick of Twilight. It's everywhere! Like, seriously? I used to love it but now it's just annoying.

on Feb. 25 2010 at 6:01 pm
--LoveHappens--, Fairfield, Connecticut
0 articles 0 photos 342 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A friend is someone who knows you, but loves you anyway"

I like the story but I think you should try to add more description. But, I like how you picked up where Twilight left off. Please take a look at my pieces and leave a comment and rate it. I would really appreciate it thanks!!! Can't wait to read the next chapter

on Feb. 21 2010 at 12:58 pm
alwayswriting14 SILVER, Northport, New York
7 articles 1 photo 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Everything makes sense yet nothing makes sense."

It was interesting, how you managed to make Renesmee sound like a child and an adult at the same time. I agree with GreenEyedGirl14 though you should include more description to create a mix between dialouge and description. Great job!!

on Feb. 20 2010 at 5:34 pm
StonerChick SILVER, Frankenmuth, Michigan
5 articles 1 photo 20 comments

Favorite Quote:
Its a dog eat dog world and we're all wearing bacon undearwear

do you have to do something special to get it approved?...i just started and it seems like people have trouble with it

on Feb. 15 2010 at 10:47 am
GreenEyedGirl15 BRONZE, Derby, Kansas
4 articles 0 photos 95 comments
The story overall was pretty good. It did seem rushed, though. Take time to write down all of the details. I am still learning writing too. Keep at it! You have a wonderful imagination!

LaylaViolet said...
on Feb. 3 2010 at 4:21 pm
Very creative, but it sounds kinda corny. The 'Daddy' and 'Mommy' and 'Auntie' and 'Grandpa' seem kinda dumb coming out of an intelligent half-vampire. Renesmee should talk just like everyone else; she's like an adult, only shorter.

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Jan. 20 2010 at 7:04 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
Haha make sure to read my third chapter :)

and thanks so muchhhh

Emi3ly SILVER said...
on Jan. 18 2010 at 9:43 pm
Emi3ly SILVER, Park City, Utah
6 articles 0 photos 9 comments

Favorite Quote:
Oooh. DRAMA! Let's get popcorn.


on Dec. 30 2009 at 7:28 pm
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

I finally got one of my stories approved. Would you mind reading it?

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 8 2009 at 7:20 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
hahaha omg I had not even realized that very observant ;)

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 8 2009 at 8:39 am
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
awww I am so glad she liked it and you as well,

I will make sure to read some of your stuff as well when they are approved

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 8 2009 at 8:38 am
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
thank for your feedback it is nice to know what I need to do to make my story better

Hope you read more :)...... well when they approve it haha

HollyFac said...
on Dec. 7 2009 at 8:46 pm
HollyFac, Bensalem, Pennsylvania
0 articles 0 photos 4 comments
I like that you took the initiative to write Renesmee's story. You have a great imagination, but I feel like you rushed through writing in this chapter, but still tried to include little details. It's very blunt and slightly nondescript, but I do very much like the idea!

Kudos to your imagination. I'm positive this will only get better with time. I look forward to the next chapter. [:

on Dec. 7 2009 at 5:45 pm
Love_Baby SILVER, Wyoming, Michigan
5 articles 4 photos 6 comments

Favorite Quote:
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."
"True love waits."
"If it made you smile never regret it."
"Not everyone's a supermodel."

Rosalie, I know this is randon but I just found out funny that in the chapter when they go in the house Rosalie is reading a magazine with taylor Swift on the cover & ur name is rosalie & ur pic is of Taylor Swift...

on Dec. 7 2009 at 3:44 pm
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

Thanks for letting me know. Every article I submitted is extremly long so I'm glad that you let me know how long I am supposed to expect before it is approved. And about your story, you are full of imagination, and that is the most important quality of any writer. I showed it to my little sister read it who is a big fan of the series you based your story on. She loved it. Keep up the good work, and have a nice morning, afternoon, or night, depending on what time of day it is when you are reading this.

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 5 2009 at 4:37 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
Well it depends, if it is a poem or a short review usually a week

If it is a long story like this one

2-3 weeks which is really quick because they approve thousands almost every day but what did you think about my story haha :)

on Dec. 5 2009 at 12:13 pm
WriterA.M. PLATINUM, Denver, Colorado
40 articles 0 photos 58 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Ignore corruption and achieve perfection"- me

About how long does it take for an article to be approved?

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 3 2009 at 4:46 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
ur very welcome haha

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 2 2009 at 5:59 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
Just to

let everyone know,

3rd chapter of this series will be posted soon

Hopefully the editors except it soon,

I can not wait for every one to read it!

dkA.M SILVER said...
on Dec. 2 2009 at 5:42 pm
dkA.M SILVER, Vail, Arizona
8 articles 0 photos 87 comments
Thank you sooo much! I love this feedback

I did write more........

Just submitted chapter 3 so keep checking in haha