Choosing My Own Life | Teen Ink

Choosing My Own Life

February 1, 2019
By basiasiwek BRONZE, Spring, Texas
basiasiwek BRONZE, Spring, Texas
2 articles 0 photos 0 comments

No matter what I do, no matter where I am, I want to touch somebody in a positive way every day. In life, the thing that brings me the most joy is bringing joy to others. Seeing smiles form from the corner of a kid’s mouth and their face light up like a Christmas tree when they realize that they can do something on their own that they have either been told they can't, or they’ve told themselves they can’t. When I hear the “Ohhhhh! I get it” and watch the self-worth in my students rise. When I am able to make someone’s life easier, I have done my daily obligation to feel complete. I am frustrated when people disagree on little things and let that come between their relationship, let’s say their political party affiliation for example-- how can one not realize you can be different yet still respect one another and be friends? Growing up, I was exposed to people of different walks of life and backgrounds. Whether it be the god you worshipped or the color of your skin, everyone was celebrated and everybody knew everybody. Growing up, things weren't like today where people barely have time for each other and forget to appreciate and love the life they were given. 
To begin with, I lived away from my parents and with my grandparents from the age of three to the age of eight in Bangalore, India. I haven't been back in thirteen years, but I can still hear the honking of horns as road rage creeps into the passenger seat of each car, backed up in traffic like you’ve never seen. We didn’t have much, in fact we did not even get a T.V. in our house until I was fourteen, but it was a happy childhood. Like any child, I swooned at the idea of the crinkle from unwrapping a golden, perfectly packaged bar of smooth and rich brown cocoa creaminess known as chocolate. Oh how I loved the feel of soft, sweet nectarous chocolate on my tongue after an afternoon playing make believe in the streets with my cousins. The same streets where vendors sold goods with lingering aromas of crispy samosas filled with savory spices and fresh citrus fruits that leaked their juices down your mouth and on to your skin. As an adolescent, I wanted to be just like (and as tall as) my hero, my grandpa. He was a journalist and was instrumental in writing very influential pieces during India’s fight for independence from the British. He was a self-made man and I still look up to him today. Now, as an adult, my hero is my son. He almost lost his life last year. He was two minutes away from flat lining, but God answered our prayers and gave him a second chance. Although he is younger than me, his positive outlook and love for life is inspiring to not only me, but everyone around him. He is a leader, yet humble, who absolutely enjoys doing what he loves and is not afraid to be different. As a mother, that is all I could ask for. My dreams for him, dreams for my family— easy, I want them to love and enjoy what is given to them through their faith and devotion for what they do.  


As a result, family is extremely important to me, but so is my faith, and somehow the two the most essential things in my life led me to my biggest regret. I was raised Hindu but fell in love with a Christian. It’s a big “no no”, you know-- to fall in love and marry one so different from you. Even now with religion and the caste system, it pretty much controls most social interactions in India. Naturally, one waits to get the blessing from their parents before proceeding with a marriage, but me being the opiniated, strong-willed person I am, did not put much thought from a parent’s perspective of what I was doing at twenty years old. It took my Dad a good three years to talk to me again after I married my husband. Don’t get me wrong, I have no regrets of marrying my husband of twenty-two years; we are soulmates. I just regret the way I did it and the broken relationship I had with my parents. With that being said, I was forced to ask myself, how much do you value the relationship? My answer was through honesty. Honesty is the most important thing in a relationship, without it you have no substance or meaning in a connection. But I’ve been blessed, I have no other regrets in this life that I love so deeply.  


Personally, I never look down upon a person or judge them based on their faith, because faith is faith. What do you have faith in? Who do you have faith in? That is what defines you. I am very rebellious by nature, if you ask me to go left...in my mind and my spirit I’m going right. So, when some people tried to push Christianity down my throat I just flat out refused and I said I am not doing this for you, I’m not doing this for anybody else, you have to allow me to walk on my journey and figure it out on my own. I am not one to blindly follow, so it took me around ten to twelve years to decide to convert from Hinduism to Christianity, but with that being said, I’m a Christian and my life has been driven in a big way to Jesus’ teachings and the Bible. It is important to figure out what is important to you. Life only happens once. It doesn’t come with an instruction manual; tangible things will come and go, and a lot of things will not be in your control, so you must take life one moment at a time. Try your best at the things you can control and everything else will fall into place. All in all, enjoy life. 


The author's comments:

I interviewed a good friend and coworker to my mother, Veena Jacobs. She works with special needs kids at a public elementary school. Due to her busy schedule, I interviewed her over the phone as she was driving home from a meeting after a full day of teaching. I had a good balance of broad and personal questions for her, allowing room for the interview to go in any direction it naturally progressed without an influence from me that could alter Veena’s responses or attitude towards questions. From this interview, I learned about not only her life, but how much she cares for others through her intentions and profession. Although her voice and opinion may not be the most heard in society it is so important. She has a lasting and influential impact on children of the future and lives her life the way she wants to because in the end, it is her living her life. I have learned to ease off the emphasis of political differences between myself and others. Lastly, I have gained an appreciation for this strong woman and a new outlook on how I’m going to choose to live my own life.


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