“I can’t do this,” I whispered, my voice hoarse with emotion and my eyes thick with crystal clear tears pooling up, threatening to overflow. “Excuse me,” I say to the rest of my family right before I turn and run out the room and down the hall, only ever seeing the white walls and white overcoats of doctors and nurses as they turn my way. I didn’t understand. Why? Why was this happening again? It just wasn’t fair. The tears were streaming down my face at this point, my hands shaking as I reached the waiting room and sat down on the ugly, green chair, my head in my hands. My throat hitched-I could barely breathe. There was only one other person in the room, at least until my oldest brother came sulking in, his eyes swollen as well, and sat down next to me. He didn’t say anything, just reached over and put my hand in his, pulling my head down into his shoulder, allowing me to hold on to him, hold on to something. He’s never done that before, but now he had. He knew I needed it, and that was as scary as it was comforting. My family meant the world to me, and now they were all leaving.

“Katherine, wake up. We need to leave.”

“What? Why? What’s going on?” I mumbled into my pillow, ignoring the dark, sullen face hovering over me and nestling back into the warm, safe blanket that grandma had made for me just last Christmas-how fitting for what I was about to find out.

“Come on, we have to hurry.”

“Okay-okay, I’m coming…” I yawned out, dragging my small feet out of bed. Someone then proceeded to gently lift me up and carry me out to the car where I fell back into a blissful sleep, only to wake up to hear a conversation that would break my heart all over again. I don’t remember exactly what was said, it was too many years ago. I probably wouldn’t have been able to tell you that night, all I know is that I overheard my parents talking, and that’s when I found out that she was gone-my grandma was gone. I would never be able to feel her warm embrace again, to hear her call my name and have tea parties together, to bake and make fun of my brothers. All I could manage to do was put my head back and wish that it was all just a bad dream. Little did I know that what I was feeling would get worse, so much worse, when we got to the hospital, and I saw her body just lying there in a hospital bed, all the life-all the love- seeping out of her body, moving straight up towards the heavens. The angels had called and it was her time to go, but knowing that, knowing that she was going to a better place, did little to ease my raw pain...