Opulence | Teen Ink

Opulence MAG

May 1, 2008
By AquaGem SILVER, Kalamazoo, Michigan
AquaGem SILVER, Kalamazoo, Michigan
5 articles 0 photos 50 comments

Favorite Quote:
Nobody will ever win the Battle of the Sexes. There's just too much fraternizing with the enemy. ~Henry Kissinger

Life it too short to let you matter.


I’ve been watching him for days now. When he leaves his house to go to school, I’m the one carefully tailing him, switching cars every day to make myself look less suspicious. If he ever sneaks out of his second-story room, I’ll be the one silently watching from a nearby tree. In class when he turns, feeling eyes on the back of his head, I’m the one who sent the hair on the back of his neck up on end. I am the girl whose shadow is always slightly overlapping his.

Being assigned to watch him almost makes me
feel like I’m not a stalker. Though I’m only 17, I’m a full-fledged member of the organization known as O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. I’ve been with them since the ­tender age of five. It’s my home. Being an orphan, my office is also my permanent residence, the couch a fold-out bed. There are many others like me: no family. A lot of us are loners and haven’t chosen this route for ourselves.

I’m a tracker. I have been for years and some might say that I am the best at not being the best. In other words, I’m great at being invisible. Or at not being noticed. It’s not as hard as the others in the organization think. Being young and female is good, since most we track are young. Seeing me around younger people – my age, actually – doesn’t raise alarm bells. It helps that I’m cute. With a small frame, light hazel eyes, and short blond hair that curls under my chin, I don’t appear threatening. Of course, my ­organization-funded training doesn’t back that theory.

Soon I won’t be tracking down others with the power. They are finally going to give me an apprentice. After years of mastering everything I’ve been taught, they see my potential. That’s not to say I know everything. Even with my extended life I won’t be able to learn all the things I want to. If only this annoying boy would show the signs. It’s been almost a week. If he doesn’t show soon, they’ll reassign me. That much longer until I get my apprentice.

So here I am, sipping a latté and waiting for the Target to leave for school. I have been put in all of his classes in case something happens there, though I graduated high school years ago. Private tutors sped things up. With no family or personal ties, I had lots of time to devote to my studies. Martial arts black belts. Twelve languages, not including English. Everything a girl needs for a serious career in the agency. Such positions of power are not handed out easily. You must prove yourself many times over.

The Target and I have never spoken, but I know a lot about him. His file told me some, but after watching him for only a few days, I feel confident in saying that I know things no one else does. Not just the obvious, either. He resents his father and is protective of his mother, which makes me suspect the father is less than faithful. He smiles often but doesn’t make a lot of eye contact. He usually only speaks when spoken to. Although he has many friends, he isn’t close with any of them. The Target is observant, a watcher. This leads me to believe we would get along if he shows any promise.

I look down at my watch, then back at his house a few blocks away. The Target is late, which means I’ll be late too. Today my ride is a shiny black sports car, not out of place in this suburb full of midlife-crisis men. I turn on the engine impatiently. I’m fiddling with the radio when I hear something. I don’t feel any immediate danger, and I know to trust those feelings. But I ­also know that something is off.

Just as I am about to get out of the car and pretend to look in the trunk, the passenger door opens. I look up in surprise as the Target slides into the seat next to me. I grin, quite pleased by this turn of events. This is definitely a good sign. Perhaps intuition is strong in him. That would be good for my apprentice to have, complementary. I could handle having to deal with that.

“Hello, Lenna. Why have you been following me for a week now?” the Target asks lightly, conversationally, his first words ever said in my direction.

Ah, one of my many aliases. The organization set it up so that whenever I’m on a case, I get a new name, past, and present. It’s very powerful. The organization can basically do anything it needs; it has people everywhere imaginable. I’m just one of many, though there aren’t that many at the top, as I am. They don’t trust many to be trackers. Or to be apprentices. All of the full members have the power, though we control others to get things done.

My smile deepens as I say in my authoritative, professional voice, “My real name is Jade. I am a witch of the moon and a tracker for the organization known as O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. You are also a witch. We would like to formally welcome you into the organization as my apprentice. Here is my card for verification.”

Jade Wordsworth
Tracker for O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E
Official Political Understanding Lending ­Everyone ­Navigation for Co-Existing Ethereals
Office hours: 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Mon-Sat
Phone: 555-5555
Proud league of witches of the sun and moon.
Worldwide.

“What do you mean ‘moon and sun’? Or ‘tracker’?” he asks, still looking at my card like it’s going to ­disappear.

“Types of magic. Moon is all about spells, the sun is more potion-based, though each type of witchcraft involves the other somehow. As a tracker, I find people like you and I bring them to O.P.U.L.E.N.C.E. Every witch must register, train, and become a member by law. In fact, the organization is like a government targeted toward witches,” I explain with a smile, loving the fact that this time I get to teach the newbie.

“Magic? Seriously?” he asks, eyes wide, meeting mine. They are large, yellow, and catlike.

I click a button on my left, automatically locking the doors. I put the car into drive, pulling out onto the road. As an afterthought I add as a courtesy, “I think you had better come with me.” .



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This article has 896 comments.


on Nov. 8 2010 at 8:38 pm
TheMagnificantLamp, Miami, Florida
0 articles 0 photos 29 comments
You show tons of promise in your writing, but this just felt so unoriginal. 

on Nov. 8 2010 at 5:16 pm
writingrocks GOLD, Brooklyn, New York
16 articles 23 photos 145 comments

Favorite Quote:
"You have to learn to love yourself before you learn to love others."

I love this short story! Its creative and suspenseful, the total thing YA readers want now. we're down with the clichéd old Twilight stuff, and we want new! We want in on this stuff! Write and post more!!!! 

on Nov. 8 2010 at 2:53 pm
secrets_of_silence GOLD, Gisborne, Other
12 articles 0 photos 439 comments

Favorite Quote:
life had i loved the more
had it but passed away
as quietly as the day
ebbs from the darkening star.


-emanuel litvinoff

 is there more???

on Nov. 6 2010 at 10:58 am
Jakethesnake BRONZE, Hernando, Mississippi
1 article 0 photos 96 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Read, Read... Read everything, then write."-William Faulkner

HEY! wheres the rest of it! :D

on Nov. 4 2010 at 11:02 pm
Karamel PLATINUM, Gwinn, Michigan
35 articles 0 photos 38 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Clever people will recognize and tolerate nothing but cleverness." -Anonymous

Ah, yes! I love Jade's kind of sarcastic benignancy. Poor Target. I feel he's in for a ride (no pun intended, considering the end of the story). I hope this is just an excerpt of something larger that you're working on.

MadiBee BRONZE said...
on Nov. 1 2010 at 2:48 pm
MadiBee BRONZE, Lancaster, New Hampshire
4 articles 0 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
If at first you don't succeed, you are running about average.
- M.H. Anderson

Um why did you call it opulence? opulence means loud lavish and ostentatious. It seems the story is shrouded in darkness and secret, not opulence. Just wondering not critizing!

P.S. i love it tho hehe one of my faves!

 


on Oct. 30 2010 at 1:48 pm
its good.....i like the begining but the end waasnt as good....

on Oct. 29 2010 at 3:40 pm
JUSTdream23 BRONZE, Mayfield Heights, Ohio
4 articles 0 photos 8 comments

Favorite Quote:
Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it is better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.

This definately could be made into a novel! Incredible idea and great tone! Would love to read more!

on Oct. 28 2010 at 12:01 pm
Fabulous story!!! I thought it was incredibly well-written, and I agree with some of the previous comments- this could easily become a best-selling novel! :) Keep up the good work!

on Oct. 27 2010 at 7:33 pm
Jessica_Twine GOLD, Marietta, Georgia
11 articles 0 photos 5 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Imperfection is Beauty Madness is Genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring!"

Very creative. I loved the way you opened it. You can go really far with this topic.

GOOD JOB(:


on Oct. 26 2010 at 3:01 pm
LivingInABasket BRONZE, Birmingham, Other
2 articles 0 photos 10 comments

Good job. There were small errors but nothing I wouldn't do myself.

It hooked me in straight away and the flow was lovely. Just watch the dialogue (the guy sounded stilted) and overloading the information. Still, the end left me wanting mroe


on Oct. 24 2010 at 9:40 pm
AaronLawrence SILVER, St. Louis, Missouri
9 articles 5 photos 106 comments

Favorite Quote:
I may be an idiot, but i'm not stupid

Until you change me enough that i'm convinced I need to change, I won't change

very exciting

Anna123 said...
on Oct. 21 2010 at 4:05 pm
i read All 3 of ur work in school kids and the teachers are crazy about ur work!!!!:)

M.K.Slate said...
on Oct. 20 2010 at 1:57 pm
M.K.Slate, Granbury, Texas
0 articles 0 photos 10 comments
Nice job CONTINUE TO WRITE

Katie1234 GOLD said...
on Oct. 17 2010 at 10:15 am
Katie1234 GOLD, Velva, North Dakota
10 articles 0 photos 77 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When life becomes more than you can stand; fall to your knees"
"To be normal is to be boring."
"You cannot make men good by law."
"Christians believe that Jesus Christ is the son of God because He said so."
"To be a Christian means to forgive the inexcusable, because God has forgiven the inexcusable in you."

This was very well written and it could turn into a best-seller. However, I think you rushed the information. Nothing was really left for the imagaination.

on Oct. 16 2010 at 6:58 pm
Dragonscribe BRONZE, West Lafayette, Indiana
4 articles 0 photos 303 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A Person's a Person no Matter how Small"
and
"A Rose by Any Other Name Would Smell as Sweet"
and
"God helps those who help themselves"

I think you gave it all away too fast, but I guess you can't help that when you have to submit them in such small sections. It sounds really good.

on Sep. 25 2010 at 8:46 pm
pfeferminz SILVER, Sebastopol, California
9 articles 0 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
Everyone has the right to be stupid but some people abuse the privilege......

sounds like the beginning of a best seller :)

LASwan SILVER said...
on Sep. 25 2010 at 4:36 pm
LASwan SILVER, Yukon, Oklahoma
5 articles 0 photos 55 comments

Favorite Quote:
Don't worry about the world endng today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
-Charles Schultz

Very well writen. Interesting and mysterious. I know everyone else has said so, but this could be a great novel if you so choose. Mind reading my works?

herahami said...
on Sep. 25 2010 at 1:13 pm
damm ur good keep up the good work i would  love to see the full version in stores someday

Elisabeth GOLD said...
on Sep. 25 2010 at 11:05 am
Elisabeth GOLD, Nottingham, New Hampshire
10 articles 0 photos 23 comments

Favorite Quote:
"A true friend is hard to find, difficult to leave, and impossible to forget."

I really liked the story, but the ending was not what I expected. I am not trying to say it is bad, because I really liked how it was unexpected, but I thought that she was going to be a part of a goverment organization and a spy or something. I like how the book had an unexpected ending.